


Working title time travel to see your parents

by Anne_Hathagay



Category: Glee
Genre: Multi, Sugar has a girlfriend in the future but shhhh don’t tell Rory, Sugar is Brittana’s daughter from the future, Time Travel, self-indulgent fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-16
Updated: 2020-08-18
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:48:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 32,489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25316335
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anne_Hathagay/pseuds/Anne_Hathagay
Summary: 2036“Mom come on I wanna see you and mom when you were younger.” Isabell whines“Fine just don’t tell your mom.” Santana says“Yes.” Alexis says“Just don’t ruin your stitches, your surgeries were expensive.” Santana says“Yes mami.” Alexis says“So when are we going back to?” Isabell asks“20th September 2011 that’s when we met you two. Your names where Sugar Motta and Alexis Motta don’t forget your guitar Alex.” Santana saysPlaylist use it don’t use it it’s all good https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4lCiby0PGLMrCss931XsQn?si=l5vx8lGPQxGLFEU_0Km1NA
Relationships: Alexis Lopez-Pierce | Motta/Skye Smith, Brittany S. Pierce/Santana Lopez, Finn Hudson/Rachel Berry (Briefly), Harmony/Sugar Motta, Isabell Lopez-Pierce | Sugar Motta/Rory Flanagan, Quinn Fabray/Rachel Berry
Kudos: 15





	1. The Purple Piano Project

2036

“Mom come on I wanna see you and mom when you were younger.” Isabell whines

“Fine just don’t tell your mom.” Santana says

“Yes.” Alexis says

“Just don’t ruin your stitches, your surgeries were expensive.” Santana says

“Yes mami.” Alexis says

“So when are we going back to?” Isabell asks

“20th September 2011 that’s when we met you two. Your names where Sugar Motta and Alexis Motta don’t forget your guitar Alex.” Santana says

“Do you know how happy it makes me to hear you call me Alexis.” She says

“All right. I’m so glad you're happy.” Santana says

“We should go before mom comes home.” Isabell says

“And remember.” Santana says

“Don’t interrupt the established timeline.” They both say before committing to time travel back to September 20th 2011 

20th September 2011

“So this is the early 2010’s? It’s less depressing than I imagined.” Alexis says

“We should find great uncle Al.” Isabell says

“Yeah. It could be a fun conversation.” Alexis says

At Al Motta’s house

“Great uncle Al.” Alexis says banging on the door

“I knew this day would come.” Al says answering the door

“Hey great uncle Al.” Isabell says hugging him

“So how long are you staying for?” He asks as they sit down with drinks

“A while. We’re hoping to be the great factors in our parents lives so we need you to be our fake dad. Also I’m transgender male to female.” Alexis says

“I’d be careful about that. But you need my money to set up that second Glee Club don’t you?” Al asks

“Yes.” Alexis says

“Speaking of Glee Club we are late for school

In the lunchroom

“This is it. The food fight.” Alexis whispers to Isabell or Sugar

“Yep.” Sugar says

Unable to resist the urge Alexis can’t help but get up and rock with the New Directions

“See the people walking down the street  
Fall in line just watching all their feet  
They don't know where they wanna go  
But they're walking in time”

“They got the beat  
They got the beat  
They got the beat  
Yeah  
They got the beat”

“All the kids just getting out of school  
They can't wait to hang out and be cool  
Hang around 'til quarter after twelve  
That's when they fall in line”

“They got the beat  
They got the beat  
Kids got the beat  
Yeah  
Kids got the beat”

“Go-go music really makes us dance  
Do the pony puts us in a trance  
Do the watusi just give us a chance  
That's when we fall in line”

“We got the beat  
We got the beat  
We got the beat  
Yeah  
We got it”

“We got the beat  
We got the beat  
We got the beat”

“Everybody get on your feet  
(We got the beat)  
We know you can dance to the beat  
(We got the beat)  
Jumpin'-get down  
(We got the beat)  
Round and round and round”

“We got the beat  
We got the beat  
We got the beat  
We got the beat  
We got the beat  
We got the beat  
We got the beat  
We got the beat  
We got the beat  
We got the beat  
We got the beat  
We got the beat  
We got the beat”

Becky Jackson tosses a cup of chilli beans on Auntie Rachel and some chicken and spaghetti lands at uncle Puck’s feet. “Oh god no.” He says

“Food fight!” JBI yells

“Why?!” Alexis yells

In the choir room

“It’s true you guys sucked ass.” Sugar says

“Sorry, who are you?” Mr Shue asks

“Apologies for my sister, she has no filter. I’m Alexis Motta and this is my sister Sugar.” She says

“I have self-diagnosed Aspergers. I’m basically a diplomat's daughter.” Sugar says

“And I’m transgender it’s difficult for me. The guitars are really all I have.” Alexis says

“What can we do for you two?” Mr Shue asks

“Here the deal my sister and I are awesome and we wanna be big, big stars. And when I saw you guys singing and dancing with my sister in the cafeteria I thought wow I’m so much better than all of you. Sorry Aspergers.” Sugar says

“As the one with actually Aspergers what my sister is trying to say is we wanna audition for the Glee Club.” Alexis says

“Well great. See guys you have inspired someone to try out. Sugar Alexis why don’t you two show us what you can do? You know take your time. Whenever your ready.” Me Shue says

“After you sister.” Alexis says tuning up her guitar

“Get ready to taste some sweet ear candy.” Sugar says. “Hit it hottie.” She says to Brad the piano player before singing outrageously off key only Alexis knew she could sing like an angel. “The minute you walked in the joint  
I could see you were a man of distinction.  
A real big spender,  
Good lookin', so refined.  
Say, wouldn't you like to know  
What's goin on in my mind?  
Hey big spender,  
Spend a little time with me.”

“My turn.” Alexis says. “So this is an oldie well it’s an oldie where I come from.” She says

“Hope when you take that jump, you don't fear the fall  
Hope when the water rises, you built a wall  
Hope when the crowd screams out, it's screaming your name  
Hope if everybody runs, you choose to stay”

“Hope that you fall in love, and it hurts so bad  
The only way you can know is give it all you have  
And I hope that you don't suffer but take the pain  
Hope when the moment comes, you'll say…”

“I, I did it all  
I, I did it all  
I owned every second that this world could give  
I saw so many places, the things that I did  
With every broken bone, I swear I lived”

“Hope that you spend your days, but they all add up  
And when that sun goes down, hope you raise your cup  
Oh, I wish that I could witness all your joy and all your pain  
But until my moment comes, I'll say…”

“I, I did it all  
I, I did it all  
I owned every second that this world could give  
I saw so many places, the things that I did  
With every broken bone, I swear I lived”

“Oh, whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh  
Oh, whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh  
Oh, whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh  
Oh, oh, oh, oh”

“With every broken bone, I swear I lived  
With every broken bone, I swear I…”

“I, I did it all  
I, I did it all  
I owned every second that this world could give  
I saw so many places, the things that I did  
With every broken bone, I swear I lived”

“Oh, whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh  
Oh, whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh  
I swear I lived  
Oh, whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh  
Oh, oh, oh, oh”

Alexis sing’s beautifully but throws the high notes and sings at the top of her range just so she can help Sugar create the Troubletones. “Holy sugar.” Mr Shue says

“Text me re: our rehearsal skedge.” Sugar syas

“Of course.” Mr Shue says

“Mr. Shue stop speaking. Okay Sugar Alexis we’ll be in touch.” Rachel says as they walk out

“You threw those high notes.” Sugar says in the hall

“You sang like a horse getting fisted.” Alexis says

“Shut up you prick.” Sugar says

“Make me.” Alexis says smirking

“There are a hundred ways I could make you shut up.” Sugar says

“Yeah but you won’t.” Alexis says

In the hallway

“Obviously your ears are busted because I worked that song like a hooker pole. It’s no biggie. I’ll come on and I’ll do it again.” Sugar says

“Meh I knew I was awful but rock and rolls what I love for so a second chance would be nice.” Alexis says

“Sugar, Alexis, I’m sorry you both can’t sing or at least in Alexis' case high notes. The answer is no. But I love your enthusiasm, and I’d be so happy to work with you guys.” Mr Shue says before Sugar cuts him off

“You know what? Who cares what you think? Hmm? Nobody. You’re a washed up Broadway wannabe who’s stuck in Lima and has led the Glee Club to how many national wins? Oh, I’m sorry, zero. Not Aspergers!” Sigar says storming away

“Wow you really laid into him.” Alexis says

“I need a reason to get away and have him not offer us a second chance.” Sugar says

“Sis you’re a genius.” Alexis says

“I get it from mom.” Sugar says

“I really wish I got mom's attitude.” Alexis says

“Come on we need to convince great uncle Al to create a second Glee Club.” Sugar says

“Yes phase 2 is a go.” Alexis says

“Great uncle Al can you come and make a Glee Club so we can convince mami to come out of the closet.” Sugar says walking in the door

“Okay we’ll do it next week.” Al says

“Great uncle Al can I have a sandwich?” Alexis asks

“Sure make whatever you want.” Al says

“That’s a mistake.” Sugar says


	2. I Am Unicorn

In Figgins office

“Mr. Motta just so I’m clear, in exchange for this very generous donation all I have to do is hire Miss. Corcoran to start a second Glee Club at McKinley featuring your daughters?” Figgins asks

“For which I will cover any and all expenses. My Sugar and my Allie are supernovas Figgy.” Al says

“You have a deal. Mrs. Denny Brown! Mr Motta has just solved our toilet paper shortage with this enormous check! Wipe away!” Figgins says

“So Miss Corcoran when do we start?” Alexis asks

“As soon as possible.” Miss Corcoran says

“Do you want proof my power on the guitar?” Alexis asks

“Sure let’s just find a place to practice.” Miss Corcoran says

The next day

“All right you two show me what you got.” Miss Corcoran says

[Alexis]  
“Lately, I've been, I've been losing sleep  
Dreaming about the things that we could be  
But, baby, I've been, I've been praying hard  
Said no more counting dollars  
We'll be counting stars  
Yeah, we'll be counting stars”

[Sugar]  
“I see this life like a swinging vine  
Swing my heart across the line  
In my face is flashing signs  
Seek it out and ye shall find”

[Both]  
“Old but I'm not that old  
Young but I'm not that bold  
And I don't think the world is sold  
On just doing what we're told”

“I feel something so right by doing the wrong thing  
And I feel something so wrong by doing the right thing”

“I couldn't lie, couldn't lie, couldn't lie  
Every thing that kills me makes me feel alive”

“Lately, I've been, I've been losing sleep  
Dreaming about the things that we could be  
But, baby, I've been, I've been praying hard  
Said no more counting dollars  
We'll be counting stars”

“Lately, I've been, I've been losing sleep  
Dreaming about the things that we could be  
But, baby, I've been, I've been praying hard  
Said no more counting dollars  
We'll be—we'll be counting stars”

[Alexis]  
“I feel the love  
And I feel it burn  
Down this river every turn  
Hope is our four-letter word  
Make that money, watch it burn”

[Sugar]  
“Old but I'm not that old  
Young but I'm not that bold  
And I don't think the world is sold  
On just doing what we're told”

[Both]  
“And I feel something so wrong by doing the right thing  
I couldn't lie, couldn't lie, couldn't lie  
Everything that drowns me makes me wanna fly”

“Lately, I've been, I've been losing sleep  
Dreaming about the things that we could be  
But, baby, I've been, I've been praying hard  
Said no more counting dollars  
We'll be counting stars”

“Lately, I've been, I've been losing sleep  
Dreaming about the things that we could be  
But, baby, I've been, I've been praying hard  
Said no more counting dollars  
We'll be—we'll be counting stars”

“Oh, take that money watch it burn  
Sink in the river the lessons I've learned  
Take that money watch it burn  
Sink in the river the lessons I've learned  
Take that money watch it burn  
Sink in the river the lessons I've learned  
Take that money watch it burn  
Sink in the river the lessons I've learned”

[Alexis with Sugar]  
“Every thing that kills me makes me feel alive”

“Lately, I've been, I've been losing sleep  
Dreaming about the things that we could be  
But, baby, I've been, I've been praying hard  
Said no more counting dollars  
We'll be counting stars”

“Lately, I've been, I've been losing sleep  
Dreaming about the things that we could be  
But, baby, I've been, I've been praying hard  
Said no more counting dollars  
We'll be—we'll be counting stars”

“Take that money watch it burn  
Sink in the river the lessons I've learned  
Take that money watch it burn  
Sink in the river the lessons I've learned  
Take that money watch it burn  
Sink in the river the lessons I've learned  
Take that money watch it burn  
Sink in the river the lessons I've learned”

“Whoo! I haven’t felt more alive!” Alexis yells

“Sis you’re yelling.” Sugar says

“Sorry.” She says wincing sheepishly

“Never be sorry for being enthusiastic. Enthusiasm is what we need to win.” Miss Corcoran says


	3. Asian F

“Hold on where are we in the established timeline?” Alexis asks

“Uh, Auntie Mercedes is gonna join this week. Mom and mami next week. Auntie Rachel and Auntie Quinn are gonna get together just after sectionals in Michael week.” Sugar says

“All right. Hold up how do you know all this?” Alexis asks

“Mom told me everything that happened in her senior year.” Sugar says

“All right goodnight.” Alexis says rolling over

Friday

“Hey Sug drop my beat.” Alexis says

“A little more specificity.” Sugar says

“Bohemian Rhapsody the Live Aid version.” Alexis says

“You got it.” Sugar says

“Mama, just killed a man  
Put a gun against his head, pulled my trigger, now he's dead  
Mama, life had just begun  
But now I’ve gone and thrown it all away  
Mama, ooh  
Didn't mean to make you cry  
If I'm not back again this time tomorrow  
Carry on, carry on as if nothing really matters”

“Too late, my time has come  
Sends shivers down my spine, body’s aching all the time  
Goodbye, everybody; I've got to go  
Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth  
Mama, ooh  
I don't want to die  
But sometimes wish I'd never been born at all”

[Guitar Solo]

“Miss Corcoran I hear you’re starting a new group. You’re gonna need my star power, so here I am.” Mercedes says

“Hey it’s Mercedes right?” Alexis asks

“Yeah Alexis right?” Mercedes asks

“Yeah. Me and Sugar were running through some songs. You any good at high notes?” Alexis asks

“High notes are my specialty.” Mercedes says

“You know Defying Gravity?” Alexis asks

“Does the earth orbit the sun?” Mercedes says

“Sugar Defying Gravity in B-flat.” Alexis says

[Mercedes]  
“Something has changed within me  
Something is not the same  
I'm through with playing by the rules of someone else's game  
Too late for second-guessing  
Too late to go back to sleep  
It's time to trust my instincts, close my eyes and leap!”

[Both]  
“It's time to try  
Defying gravity  
I think I'll try  
Defying gravity  
Kiss me goodbye  
I'm defying gravity  
And you won't bring me down”

[Alexis]  
“I'm through accepting limits 'cause someone says they're so  
Some things I cannot change but 'til I try, I'll never know!  
Too long I've been afraid of losing love I guess I've lost  
Well, if that's love, it comes at much too high a cost!”

[Both]  
“I'd sooner buy  
Defying gravity  
Kiss me goodbye  
I'm defying gravity  
I think I'll try  
Defying gravity  
And you won't bring me down”

[Mercedes (Alexis)]  
“Unlimited (unlimited)  
My future is (future is) unlimited (unlimited)  
And I've just had a vision  
Almost like a prophecy  
I know it sounds truly crazy  
And true, the vision's hazy  
But I swear, someday I'll be…”

“Flying so high! (defying gravity)  
Kiss me goodbye! (defying gravity)”

“So if you care to find me  
Look to the western sky!  
As someone told me lately,  
"Everyone deserves the chance to fly!"

“I'm defying gravity!  
And you won't bring me down, bring me down, bring me down!  
Ah, ah [echo]”

“Hot damn.” Alexis says taking off her hat and fanning her like she’s on fire

“You are on fire Mercedes.” Sugar says

“All right this next one is a personal favourite. Sugar Welcome to the Black Parade.” Alexis says 

“When I was a young boy  
My father took me into the city  
To see a marching band  
He said, "Son when you grow up  
Would you be the savior of the broken  
The beaten and the damned?"  
He said "Will you defeat them  
Your demons, and all the non-believers  
The plans that they have made?"  
"Because one day I'll leave you  
A phantom to lead you in the summer  
To join The Black Parade"

“When I was a young boy  
My father took me into the city  
To see a marching band  
He said, "Son when you grow up  
Would you be the saviour of the broken  
The beaten and the damned?"

“Sometimes I get the feeling she's watching over me  
And other times I feel like I should go  
And through it all, the rise and fall, the bodies in the streets  
And when you're gone we want you all to know”

“We'll carry on  
We'll carry on  
And though you're dead and gone believe me  
Your memory will carry on  
We'll carry on  
And in my heart I can't contain it  
The anthem won't explain it”

“A world that sends you reeling from decimated dreams  
Your misery and hate will kill us all  
So paint it black and take it back  
Let's shout it loud and clear  
Defiant to the end we hear the call”

“To carry on  
We'll carry on  
And though you're dead and gone believe me  
Your memory will carry on  
We'll carry on  
And though you're broken and defeated  
Your weary widow marches”

“On and on we carry through the fears  
Ooh oh ohhhh  
Disappointed faces of your peers  
Ooh oh ohhhh  
Take a look at me cause I could not care at all”

“Do or die, you'll never make me  
Because the world will never take my heart  
Go and try, you'll never break me  
We want it all, we wanna play this part  
I won't explain or say I'm sorry  
I'm unashamed, I'm gonna show my scar  
Give a cheer for all the broken  
Listen here, because it's who we are  
I'm just a man, I'm not a hero  
Just a boy, who had to sing this song  
I'm just a man, I'm not a hero  
I  
Don't  
Care!”

“We'll carry on  
We'll carry on  
And though you're dead and gone believe me  
Your memory will carry on  
You'll carry on  
And though you're broken and defeated  
Your weary widow marches on”

“Do or die, you'll never make me  
Because the world will never take my heart  
Go and try, you'll never break me  
We want it all, we wanna play this part (We'll carry on)”

“Do or die, you'll never make me (We'll carry on)  
Because the world will never take my heart (We'll carry on)  
Go and try, you'll never break me  
We want it all, we wanna play this part  
(We'll carry on!)”

“Damn you destroyed that song.” Mercedes says

“Thank you.” Alexis says taking her hat off and taking a bow

“All right guys let’s get to work.” Miss Corcoran says. “Also Alexis we’re gonna work on your high notes.” She says


	4. Pot o’Gold

“Hold up, isn't this the week mom and mami join?” Alexis asks

“Yes dummy. So get ready.” Sugar says

“For what?” Alexis asks

“The ad campaign and mom finally coming out to our grandparents dummy. God did you ever listen?” Sugar asks rolling her eyes

“All right let's get started. Alex you said you had something to perform?” Miss Corcoran asks

“Yeah. I just put this together last night.” Alexis says

“We can hold up  
Each other like sequoia roots  
So, baby, hold up  
We don't go with the flow  
So where you want to go, girl?  
I'll carry you”

“We can hike up  
Up the Hills, to the Hollywood sign  
We'll see it close up  
But the sign doesn't shine  
Quite enough to make the stars align, girl  
But you do”

“'Cause you're shakin' me up like San Andreas  
With your Cali tan lines and that dress from Vegas  
Your future's so bright I'm goin' blind  
I'm in a golden state of mind  
Blazin' by me like the wildfire  
Leavin' I-5 dirt on all four of my tires  
You're speedin' ahead, I love the view from behind”

“When I'm with  
You, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh  
You, ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh  
I'm in a golden state of mind when I'm with you”

“We can drive up  
Up PCH to the pier  
Yeah, things are heatin' up  
Taste the salt in the air  
And tequila on your lips, girl  
That's how you do”

“We can line up  
And wait for hours by the castle  
We'll put our hands up  
But these theme park thrills  
Don't give me all the same feels, girl  
That you do”

“'Cause you're shakin' me up like San Andreas  
With your Cali tan lines and that dress from Vegas  
Your future's so bright I'm goin' blind  
I'm in a golden state of mind  
Blazin' by me like the wildfire  
Leavin' I-5 dirt on all four of my tires  
You're speedin' ahead, I love the view from behind”

“When I'm with  
You, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh  
You, ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh  
I'm in a golden state of mind when I'm with you”

“And I, I...  
I'm in a golden state of mind  
No matter the state I'm in  
I know I'm stayin' in  
Your county lines  
Where your love shines”

“'Cause you're shakin' me up like San Andreas  
With your Cali tan lines and that dress from Vegas  
Your future's so bright I'm goin' blind  
I'm in a golden state of mind  
Blazin' by me like the wildfire  
Leavin' I-5 dirt on all four of my tires  
You're speedin' ahead, I love the view from behind”

“When I'm with  
You, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh  
You, ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh  
I'm in a golden state of mind when I'm with  
You, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh  
You, ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh  
I'm in a golden state of mind when I'm with you”

“So Alexis what did you call that?” Mercedes asks

“Golden State of Mind. I thought I’d explore country and western music.” Alexis says

“My boyfriend was a country guy.” Mercedes says

“What was his name?” Sugar asks

“Sam Evans.” Mercedes says

“Sounds like a nice guy.” Alexis says

Then Santana and Brittany walk in. “Time for the bitchy act.” Sugar whispers. “Awesome, more back up for me.” She says out loud

“Oh okay, you know what? I did not just leave one diva driven Glee Club to join another.” Santana says

“Apologises for my sister as I said when we first met she has no filter and can come off bitchy.” Alexis says

“It’s okay. But let me write you a reality check Richie Bitch. I’ve seen what you can do and what you can do is stand in the back, sway, and sing very, very quietly.” Santana says

“I just wanted to be on the winning team for once.” Sugar says

“Then turn down the ‘tude and you will be little sis.” Alexis says

“I’m four minutes younger than you.” Sugar says

“I will hit you with my guitar cause dad’ll just buy me a new one.” Alexis says holding her guitar like a club

“I like you. You got fire in your veins.” Santana says

“Ladies. Welcome. We were just brainstorming names for our new group.” Miss Corcoran says

“Perfect. Hot Bitches. Or Hot Messes” Santana says

“Meh I’m partial to the rock and roll lesbians.” Alexis says

“Free Beer.” Brittany says

“Uh, it was thinking something more captured our essence, sums up who we want to be, who we really are.” Miss Corcoran says

“Well what we are is trouble for the other groups. Sugars piano abilities, Alexis ability to work a guitar and our singing abilities.” Mercedes says

“The Troubletones I like it.” Miss Corcoran says

“That’s good.” Santana says

“I like that too.” Sugar says

In the auditorium

“Tarzan and Jane were swingin' on a vine  
Candyman, candyman  
Sippin' from a bottle of vodka double wine  
Sweet sugar candyman”

“I met him out for dinner on a Friday night  
He really got me working up an appetite  
He had tattoos up and down his arms  
There's nothing more dangerous than a boy with charm”

“He's a one stop shop, makes my panties drop  
He's a sweet talkin' sugar coated candyman  
A sweet talkin' sugar coated candyman, (ooh, yeah)”

“Sweet sugar candyman”

“He's a one stop, gotcha hot, making all the panties drop  
Sweet sugar candyman  
He's a one stop, got me hot, making my ugh pop  
Sweet sugar candyman  
He's a one stop, get it while it's hot, baby don't stop  
Sweet sugar”

“He's got those lips like sugarcane  
Good things come for boys who wait”

“He's a one stop shop with a real big ugh  
He's a sweet talkin' sugar coated candyman  
A sweet talkin' sugar coated candyman  
Candyman, candyman, candyman, candyman  
Candyman, candyman, candyman, candyman”

“That was awesome.” Alexis says

“You were pretty good and funky.” Mercedes says

“I am but a humble servant compared to your musical abilities”. Alexis says

“If you can play the guitar half as well you can rock that dress we can win sectionals with our eyes closed.” Santana says

“It’s a little difficult to play the guitar with your eyes closed.” Alexis says

They all fall over in peals of laughter. “It would be pretty difficult.” Brittany says


	5. The First Time

“Hey guys can you meet me in the auditorium?” Alexis asks

“Why?” Santana asks

“It’s a little rock number but I think it’s a good contender for sectionals.” Alexis says

“What’s the song?” Mercedes asks

“We Will Rock You by Queen.” Alexis says

In the auditorium 

“All right Santana do you wanna take the lead?” Alexis asks

“Sure.” Santana says

[Santana]  
“Buddy you're a boy make a big noise  
Playin' in the street gonna be a big man some day  
You got mud on yo' face  
You big disgrace  
Kickin' your can all over the place  
Singin'”

[The Troubletones]  
“We will we will rock you  
We will we will rock you”

[Santana]  
“Buddy you're a young man hard man  
Shoutin' in the street gonna take on the world some day  
You got blood on yo' face  
You big disgrace  
Wavin' your banner all over the place”

[The Troubletones (Alexis)]  
“We will we will rock you  
(Sing it out!)  
We will we will rock you”

[Santana]  
“Buddy you're an old man poor man  
Pleadin' with your eyes gonna make you some peace some day  
You got mud on your face  
Big disgrace  
Somebody better put you back into your place”

[The Troubletones (Alexis)]  
“We will we will rock you  
(Sing it!)  
We will we will rock you  
(Everybody)  
We will we will rock you  
We will we will rock you”

[guitar solo]

“(Alright)”

“All right, we like taking a bite out of the Big Apple? Who wants to take a bite out of me?” Alexis asks

“What the hell?” Brittany asks

“It’s Madison Square Garden 1977. Now play with me.” Alexis says

[Alexis (The Troubletones)]  
“Ay-oh (Ay-oh)  
Ay-oh (Ay-oh)  
Ay-oh (Ay-oh)  
Ay-oh (Ay-oh)  
Ay-oh (Ay-oh)  
Ay-oh (Ay-oh)  
Ayyyyy-oh (Ayyyyy-oh)  
Ay-oh (Ay-oh)  
Ay-oh (Ay-oh)  
De-da-di-da-di-da-di-de-do (De-da-di-da-di-da-di-de-do)  
De-do (De-do)  
De-do (De-do)  
Alright (Alright)”

“Where was that from?” Santana asks

“That was, uh, Live Aid 1985 for the famine in Ethiopia.” Alexis says

“It’s a call and response pattern. It’s about controlling the crowd, right sis?” Sugar asks

“Yes Freddie could turn his hand round and the crowd would stand up and eat out of it metaphorically.” Alexis says


	6. Mash-Off

“It’s this week isn’t it? The ad campaign?” Alexis asks

“Yes. It’s gonna hurt to see her like that but we can’t interfere. Lest we ruin.” Sugar starts

“The established timeline.” Alexis finishes

“So we can’t, you know, do anything except sing about it.” Alexis says

“Exactly. We know what comes after that?” Sugar asks

“I Kissed a Girl? Love that song.” Alexis says

In the auditorium

“What are you doing here?” Rachel asks

“Shelby told us to come. She said she had something to show us.” Mercedes says. “What are you doing here?” She asks

“The only problem is my ditzy sister is missing.” Sugar says

“Mr. Shue said the same thing.” Finn says

“Let me guess he wants to combine choirs for Sectionals?” Santana asks. “Well it’s not gonna happen. The Troubletones are here to stay.” She adds. “So why don’t you shuffle your busted choir off our stage.” Santana says smirking

“Look, you guys, we can compete without being enemies. All right we don’t have to get vicious.” Finn says

“I think we do, Soft Serve. See the Troubletones are 3F: fierce, femme, phenomenal. And hurry up go get some moist towels. We have to keep Finn wet before we can roll him into the sea.” Santana says

“Okay, you know what, Santana, Finn is in great shape, and your meanness only highlights your own personal insecurities.” Rachel says

“And, Rachel, your moustache is thicker than a Middle Eastern dictator.” Santana says

[Shelby:]  
It's been a long time since I came around  
Been a long time but I'm back in town  
This time I'm not leaving without you

[Will:]  
“Just you and I  
Sharing our love together  
And I know in time  
We'll build the dreams we treasure  
We'll be all right, just you and I”

[Shelby:]  
“Something, something about this place”

[Will:]  
“Just you and  
Just you and I”

[Shelby:]  
“Something 'bout lonely nights and my lipstick on your face”

[Will:]  
“Just you and I”

[Shelby:]  
“Something, something about my cool Nebraska guy”

[Both:]  
“Yeah, something about, baby, you and I”

[Both:]  
“Oh, You and I  
And I remember our first embrace  
That smile that was on your face  
The promises that we made”

“And now, your love is my reward  
And I love you even more  
Than I ever did before”

[Both:]  
“Something, something about this place”

[Will:]  
“Just you and  
Just you and I”

[Both:]  
“Something 'bout lonely nights and my lipstick on your face”

[Will:]  
“Just you and I”

[Both:]  
“Something, something about my cool Nebraska guy”

[Shelby:]  
“From Nebraska”

[Will:]  
“From Nebraska”

[Shelby:]  
“From Nebraska  
Nebraska”

[Both:]  
“I love You  
You, you and I  
You and I”

[Shelby:]  
“Nebraska”

[Both:]  
“You and I  
I love you  
You and I”

[Both:]  
“We made it  
You and I”

“Mr. Shue, Shelby, I think we can all admit that that was weirdly amazing.” Rachel says. “But what exactly was the point?” She then asks

“That sometimes bringing together two conflicting things can create something totally unexpected.” Mr Shue says

“We’re not combining Glee Clubs, Mr Shue.” Mercedes says

“That’s not what I’m talking about. Shelby and I agreed that with Sectionals coming up for both of us, it’s time things got serious with some friendly competition.” Mr Shue says

“Each groups going to perform a mash up to perform head to head.” Shelby says

“For the first annual McKinley High Mash-Off.” Mr Shue says

“Mash-Off.” Shelby repeats there are cheers and whoops.

In the gym

“Did I ever mention I hate dodgeball?” Alexis says

“How can you hate dodgeball?” Santana asks

“Because in my old town I was the skinny uncoordinated trans kid who was awkward in her body who didn’t wanna do gym class so I used to fake stomach issues until my mom found out and made me go to gym class and it didn’t end well. For anyone.” Alexis says

“Aww well we’ll protect you.” Brittany says as Finn blows his whistle

“Let’s roadhouse!” He yells

“Oh it’s on Pillsbury Dough Turd.” Santana says

“Excuse me, I've never heard of this game of dodging balls before. What’s the rules?” Rory asks

“Don’t die.” Puck says

“Let’s do this.” Brittany says turning on the boombox

“Hit Me With Your Best Shot!  
Why Don't You Hit Me With Your Best Shot”!

“I'm gonna get ya', get ya', get ya', get ya'” 

“Hit Me With Your Best Shot!  
Fire Away!”

“I'm gonna get ya', get ya', get ya', get ya' “

“One way or another, I'm gonna find ya'  
I'm gonna get ya', get ya', get ya', get ya'  
One way or another, I'm gonna win ya'  
I'm get ya', I'm get ya'”

“Well you're the real tough cookie with the long history  
Of breaking little hearts, like the one in me  
That's O.K., lets see how you do it  
Put up your dukes, let's get down to it!”

“Hit Me With Your Best Shot!  
Why Don't You Hit Me With Your Best Shot!”

“I'm gonna get ya', get ya', get ya', get ya'”

“And if the lights are all out  
I'll follow your bus downtown  
See who's hangin' out.....”

“Hit Me With Your Best Shot!  
Fire Away!”

“I'm gonna get ya', get ya', get ya', get ya'”

“Hit Me With Your Best Shot! (Hit Me With Your Best Shot!)  
Why Don't You Hit Me With Your Best Shot!”

“I'm gonna get ya', get ya', get ya', get ya' (Hit Me With Your Best Shot!)”

Let’s just say the girls won. “Okay good game.” Finn says

“Boy, oh, boy that was a cracker!” Rory says before the girls pelt him with dodgeballs causing him to bleed

“All right ladies, he's had enough, let’s go.” Alexis says

In the choir room

“Ladies vocal warm ups can wait. Now, I was up half the night thinking about our mash up for the mash-off, and it came to me Adele.” Mercedes says

“I sound just like her.” Sugar says

“Dude, I love her. She sounds like what banana cream pie sounds like when it sings.” Brittany says

“I think it’s a great idea Mercedes. I think that we could really kill worth that stuff.” Shelby says.

“Agreed. And now with that decision out of the way, I can stay focused on my one sided battle of wits with the knuckle dragger.” Santana says

“Santana the dodgeball thing was fun, until the end, but enough.” Mercedes says

“No, honey I’m just starting.” Santana says

“Santana seriously enough. I’m sure Finn has enough on his plate with Rachel nagging him constantly and sectionals coming up and it’s possible Quinn may or may not be crushing on his girlfriend.” Alexis says

“I’m the leader of this group and with Alexis as my co captain we’re telling you to stop.” Mercedes says

“Yeah you really should lay off those guys.” Alexis says

“I’m sorry. The leader? Who died and made you queen, Aretha?” Santana asks

“I brought you guys in and I came up with idea for the mash up while you were wasting time trying to figure out how to make Finn Hudson cry. So I nominate myself as President of the Troubletones. With Alexis as my Vice President.” Mercedes says

“All in favour?” Alexis asks everyone expect Brittany put their hands up

“I’m not impressed by your campaign. You didn’t put any posters up.” Brittany says

“Five in favour means Mercedes and Alexis get elected. And she’s right. We should all be focusing on winning because we are better not meaner. Mr. Shue and I both agreed on ground rules. We play fair.” Shelby says

“I just don’t have time for this kind of thinking.” Santana says

“We’ll make time. Because you are a star member of this group and you need to represent.” Mercedes says

“Stop the violence.” Brittany sings and Santana smiles. “Come on.” She says

“Okay. God, okay. Look, I’ll play fair. From now on I will be so nice that cotton candy won’t melt in my mouth. That’s really nice. That’s really nice.” Santana says

“Damn now I’m hungry.” Alexis says. “Who wants pizza?” She asks

Later that day

“Miss Corcoran I’ve been thinking and I know how we can win. Sectionals that is.” Alexis says

“First if all please call me Shelby and two please tell me.” Shelby says

“Audience participation.” Alexis says

“Elaborate.” Shelby says

“Last week me and the girls we did We Will Rock You and it sounded awesome. Audience participation is the performers strongest weapon.” Alexis says

“So what you’re saying is you wanna sing We Will Rock You at Sectionals?” Shelby asks

“Yes.” Alexis says

“All right I’ll think about it.” Shelby says

In the auditorium

“Welcome, everyone, to day one of the first annual McKinley High Mash-Off! Okay, a couple of ground rules. Everyone, there will be no heckling of any kind, okay? All right here we go.” Mr Shue says

“Finn will represent the New Directions; Alexis the Troubletones in Rock Paper Scissors. To see who performs first. Let’s get it going!” Mr Shue says

“Let’s do this.” Finn says. 

“One, two, three!” They both say and Finn wins the match. 

“Okay, paper covers rock. New Directions take the stage!” Mr Shue says

“Sorry I lost guys my mind wasn’t so sharp today.” Alexis apologises

“What I want, you've got  
But it might be hard to handle  
Like the flame that burns the candle  
The candle feeds the flame eh eh”

“What I've got is a full stock  
Of thoughts and dreams that scatter  
You pull them all together  
And how I can't explain oh yeah”

“Well well you (I can't go for that)  
You make my dreams come true  
(I can't go for that, I can't go for that)  
Well well well you  
(I can't go for that)  
Oh yeah you make my dreams come true  
(I can't go for that, I can't go for that)”

“On a night when bad dreams become a screamer  
When they're messin' with a dreamer  
I can laugh it in the face  
Twist and shout my way out  
And wrap yourself around me  
'Cause I ain't the way you found me  
And I'll never be the same oh yeah”

“Well 'cause you (I can't go for that)  
You make my dreams come true  
(I can't go for that, I can't go for that)  
Well well well you  
(I can't go for that)  
Oh yeah you make my dreams come true  
(I can't go for that, I can't go for that)”

“I'm down on my daydream  
But that sleepwalk should be over by now  
I know”

“Yeah, you  
I, I'll do anything that you want me to  
I, I'll do almost anything that you want me to  
You make my dreams come true (oh yeah)  
I, I'll do anything that you want me to  
I, I'll do almost anything that you want me to  
You make my dreams come true  
(I can't go for that)  
You make my dreams come true  
(I can't go for that, I can't go for that)  
You make my dreams come true  
(I can't go for that, I can't go for that)  
You make my dreams come true.”

After the senior class president debate. 

“You guys ready for the Mash-Off later?” Alexis asks   
“Yeah I think you need to stop making fun of finn.” Brittany says

“I agree you’re being really harsh

“Please manatees have really thick skin.” Santana says as Becky runs up to the three of them

“Santana, Alexis Coach Sue needs you in her office right away.” She says

In Coach Sues office

To say that Alexis’ heart was pounding a thousand times a minute would be an understatement if you took her pulse it would be off the charts. She knew that this moment was coming but she never thought she’d be here herself though. “What is going on?” Santana ask

“Santana, Alexis have a seat.” Sue says they do so. “I’m afraid I have some bad news, and I think I might be to blame.” She says

“You think?” Burt says

“Watch your blood pressure Bubbles. In my campaign to become Ohio’s newest congresswoman, I’ve said something’s that are not true, and I don’t feel good about it. I set the tone for this campaign, and now I’m afraid my slanderous chickens have come home to roost.” Sue says

“Santana, Alexis, you should know I have the phone number of two counsellors who specialize in these areas.” Mr Shue says

“And Santana this is something I’ve dealt with first hand and I’d be willing to talk to your parents.” Burt says

“What are you talking about?” Santana asks

“Why would I need a councillor who’s just gonna tell me what I already know that I’m gender dysphoric?” Alexis asks

“Reggie ‘the Sauce’ Salazar sent me an advanced copy of his latest campaign ad.” Burt says popping the tape into the player

“It turns out he has a niece who goes to this school, and he overheard a conversation between Santana and Finn Hudson.” Sue says as Burt turns the tape on

“Sue Sylvester wants to represent Ohio. She says she shares your values. If that true boy do was have some questions if your so into family values, why did you promote a lesbian student to be your head Cheerio? And when did you plan on telling Ohio families? Also why do you let your Cheerios hang around with a transsexual who’s had a black market sex change operation? And when did you plan on announcing your plan to campaign for transgender people have their surgeries covered by their medical insurance? Here’s another question: why don’t you have a husband Sue? Is there something you’re not telling us? Sue Sylvester. So many questions.” The ominous voices in the ad says

“Well that’s it looks like I’m changing schools again after sectionals in a couple of weeks.” Alexis says head in her hands

“I can’t believe this is happening. I have even told my parents yet.” Santana says sobbing as they both run out the door hand in hand tear streaming down their faces

In the auditorium

“She, she ain't real,  
She ain't gonna be able to love you like I will  
Sure, she's got it all,  
But, baby, is that really what you want?”

“Bless your soul, you've got your head in the clouds  
You made a fool out of you  
And, boy, she's bringing you down  
She made your heart melt  
But you're cold to the core,  
Now rumour has it she ain't got your love anymore”

“Rumour has it   
Rumour has it  
Rumour has it   
Rumour has it”

“Don't forget me, I beg  
I remember you said”

“I heard that you're settled down  
That you found a girl and you're married now.  
I heard that your dreams came true.  
Guess she gave you things I didn't give to you.”

“Rumour has it   
Rumour has it  
Rumour has it   
Rumour has it”

“Don't forget me, I beg  
I remember you said”

“Never mind, I'll find someone like you  
I wish nothing but the best for you too  
Don't forget me, I beg  
I remember you said,  
Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead,  
Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead.”

As the song ends Puck whispers something to Mike as Finn whispers something to Rachel Santana and Alexis fly off the stage

“What did you tell him?” Alexis snaps at Puck

“What do you just say to her?” Santana ask Finn

“Said I thought you guys were awesome.” Puck says

“I said I thought you guys were great”. Finn says

“You’re lying.” The both say

“No he literally just said that.” Mike and Rachel says

“Did you tell some skank you used for a quickie?” Alexis asks

“Did you tell her too?” Santana asks. “Everyone gonna know now, because of you!” She yells

“Everyone is gonna know and it’s not gonna end well.” Alexis says jabbing Puck in the chest

“The whole school already knows Alexis and guess what they don’t care.” Puck says

“The whole school already knows, and you know what? They don’t give a flip.” Finn says

“Not just the whole school you idiot. The whole town.” Santana says

“Do you know what happens to people like me when our secret gets out? We get run out of town or lynched. Do you know what lynching is Puckerman? It’s where a group of towns folk gather together and kill someone for being different at first it was people of colour nowadays it’s LGBTQ+ people.” Alexis says

“What are you talking about?” They both ask as Alexis punches Puck and Santana slaps Finn and the whole auditorium is filled with shocked faces


	7. I Kissed A Girl

In Figgins office

“I’m sorry, but since a student had lit firecrackers stuffed down his pants three years ago, we’ve had a zero tolerance violence policy.” Figgins says as Puck holds his nose a trickle of blood still running out of it the splatter of blood still on Alexis left hand

“Is that why you suspend all the kids who’ve been tossing slushies in our faces for the past three years?” Santana asks

“I concur it’s cold and sucks.” Alexis says

“Slushies are not on the school board approved list of suspend worthy weapons.” Figgins says

“Here what you have to know: we didn’t do it.” Santana says

“Santana we all saw you and Alexis punch and slap Finn and Puck unprovoked.” Mr. Shue says

“No but seriously we didn’t do it. When we get pissed Santana and Alexis get taken over by our angry alter egos Snixxx and Snixxx Jr. her wrath of words is called ‘Snixxx juice.’ I’m totally powerless we’re like the Incredible Hulk. You can’t blame us for it.” Alexis says

“I’m suspending both of you and Snixxx and Snixxx Jr. two weeks. No arguments.” Figgins says

“Sectionals is next week. If you suspend us, I want be able to beat Grimace and Mr. Shue’s butts.” Santana says

“Yeah and then I won’t be around to watch the squirrel stapled to Pucks head rot when he sees our awesome girl power.” Alexis says

“Miss. Corcoran I highly recommend you do something about this.” Santana says

“I’m sorry Santana, Alexis, Sectionals is important, but so is learning your lesson.” Mr Shue says

“I hate to say it but I agree.” Shelby says

“This is garbage. Hamburglar Finn is fine.” Santana says

“And so mohock I didn’t even hit him that hard the squirrels still attached.” Alexis says

“They didn’t hit us.” Finn says and Puck plays along.

“Yeah. See fine.” Puck says

“I know it looked and sounded like they did but honestly they didn’t.” Finn says

“Yeah Mr. Shue what’s it called in a play or a movie when you pretend to hit someone but you don’t?” Puck asks not even playing dumb

“A stage slap?” Shelby suggests

“They were stage slaps. Well in Puck’s case a stage hit.” Finn days

“And if they didn’t hit us then you can’t suspend them.” Puck says catching Finns idea

“But the blood?” Mr Shue asks

“Fake.” Alexis says

“Also what is your angle here Finn, Puck?” Mr Shue asks

“The truth. Like Puck said if they didn’t actually hit us you can’t suspend them.” Finn says

“No.” Figgins says

“Then that’s what happened.” Puck says

Outside Figgins office

“Were mischievous birches, but between us we can’t forgive out what the hell this is all about.” Santana says

“Well I want sectionals to be a fair fight. And they can’t happen without you two on the Troubletones.” Finn says and Puck nods in agreement

“Well actually it would only be a fair fight with us off the team.” Alexis says

“We feel bad for you. I know the four of us have been at each other’s throats these past few weeks but the truth is I think you’re both awesome. And when you hide who you are, Santana, I feel like you hid part of that awesomeness with you.” Finn says

“Which is why you act out and hit us because your hurt inside every day.” Puck days

“That’s sweet of you to think that in exchange for keeping us from getting suspended we’re gonna come back.” Santana starts before Finn interrupts her

“Come back to Glee Club. Exactly. You and all the Troubletones. We have an idea for a lesson but it won’t work if you’re not there.” Finn says

“Did Miss. Corcoran and Mr. Shue already agree to this?” They both ask

“Look it’s up to you two. Either you can come back to the choir and embrace your awesomeness.” Finn says

“Or take a two week vacation and enjoy your seat in the audience at sectionals.” Puck says

In the choir room

Finn writes Lady music week on the board. “Can someone please tell us what’s going one?” Mercedes asks

“This week, the Troubletones and New Directions will both be singing music by ladies and for ladies.” Finn syas

“Oh hell no.” Santana says

“Fuck this.” Alexis says

“Next week, all of us are going to sectionals, and one of us is probably gonna win. But Santana Alexis were worried about you two.” Finn says

“Well don’t be, I'll be gone in a couple of weeks I'm thinking Fiji or maybe Egypt somewhere warm.” Alexis says

“Worry about yourself fetus face.” Santana says

“Glee’s about learning how to accept yourself for who you are, no matter what other people think. And that was what this music is about.” Finn says

“So wait Santana and I don’t even get a say in this?” Alexis asks

“Not cool.” Santana says

“Everybody in this room knows about you and Brittany.” Finn says

“And everyone in this room knows and accepts you for who you really are Alexis.” Puck says

“And no one is judging either of you for it. Instead we celebrate it because it’s who you are. Look I know everyone outside this room isn’t as accepting and cool, but we’re doing this assignment this week so that you know in this rotten, stinking world that you at least have a group of people who will support who you both choose to be.” Finn says with Puck smiling approvingly

“That’s it. That's what we’re doing here. Blaine? Kurt?” Puck says

“Santana Alexis Kurt and I have a song we like to sing to each other in the car. And we want to sing that for you right now.” Blaine says

“Well there nothing I’d love more than having two Pretty Ponies serenade me, I think we’d get further staging a ‘gel-ervention’ for Blaine than singing lady music.” Santana says

“I concur it looks like you have tiny fairy’s constantly crying on your head it’s so wet.” Alexis says

“Look Santana I get it's hard. It was hard for me too. But you can get through this.” Kurt says

“If you would just stop being so defensive.” Blaine says

“I’m trying, but your hideous bow ties are provoking me.” Santana says

“And that sweater looks like something my gran would wear.” Alexis says

“Wait are we taking lady on lady or girl on girl?” Puck asks. “Cause there’s a big difference.” He adds

“Shut up Puckerman.” Alexis says taking off her sneaker and throwing at Puck’s head

“Kirt Blaine why don’t you kick us off with what you got?” Mr Shue says

“Made a wrong turn once or twice  
Dug my way out, blood and fire  
Bad decisions, that's alright  
Welcome to my silly life”

“Mistreated, misplaced, misunderstood  
Miss 'No way, it's all good'  
It didn't slow me down  
Mistaken, always second guessing  
Underestimated, look I'm still around”

“Pretty, pretty please, don't you ever, ever feel  
Like you're less than less than perfect  
Pretty, pretty please, if you ever, ever feel  
Like you're nothing, you are perfect to me”

“The whole world's scared, so I swallow the fear  
The only thing I should be drinking is an ice cold beer  
So cool in line and we try try try but we try too hard  
And it's a waste of my time  
Done looking for the critics, cause they're everywhere  
They don't like my jeans, they don't get my hair  
Exchange ourselves and we do it all the time  
Why do we do that, why do I do that (why do I do that)?”

“(Yeah! Ooooh!)  
I'm pretty, pretty, please”

“Pretty, pretty please, don't you ever, ever feel  
Like you're less than less than perfect  
Pretty, pretty please, if you ever, ever feel  
Like you're nothing, you are perfect to me  
(Pretty, pretty please, don't you ever, ever feel  
Like you're less than less than perfect)  
You're perfect, you're perfect to me  
Pretty, pretty please, if you ever, ever feel  
Like you're nothing, you are perfect to me”

“Thank you guys. Thank you Finn especially. You know, with all the horrible crap I’ve been through in my life now I get to add that.” Santana says

“Meh I’ve heard worse specifically dad with a lady friend.” Alexis says

“Please baby can't you see  
My mind's a burnin' hell  
I got razors a rippin' and tearin' and strippin'  
My heart apart as well  
Tonight you told me  
That you ache for something new  
And some other woman is lookin' like something  
That might be good for you”

“Go on and hold her till the screaming is gone  
Go on believe her when she tells you nothing's wrong”

“But I'm the only one  
Who'll walk across the fire for you  
I'm the only one  
Who'll drown in my desire for you  
It's only fear that makes you run  
The demons that you're hiding from  
When all your promises are gone  
I'm the only one”

“Please baby can't you see  
I'm trying to explain  
I've been here before and I'm locking the door  
And I'm not going back again  
Her eyes and arms and skin won't make it go away  
You'll wake up tomorrow and wrestle the sorrow  
That holds you down today”

“Go on and hold her till the screaming is gone  
Go on believe her when she tells you nothing's wrong”

“But I'm the only one  
Who'll walk across the fire for you  
I'm the only one  
Who'll drown in my desire for you  
It's only fear that makes you run  
The demons that you're hiding from  
When all your promises are gone  
I'm the only one”

“That was for you Santana. Yeah, I know it’s just part of a phase, but whatever, happy to oblige always.” Puck says

“Can I punch him again yet?” Alexis asks

“No.” Santana says

[Finn and Puck]  
“I came home in the middle of the night  
My father says, "What you gonna do with your life?"  
Well, Daddy dear, you're still number one  
Oh girls, they wanna have fun  
Oh girls, they…”

“The phone rings in the middle of the night  
My mother says, "When you gonna live your life right?"  
Well, mother dear, we're not the fortunate ones  
Oh girls, they wanna have fun  
Oh girls, they…”

“That's all they really want...  
Those girls, they wanna have fun”

“Some boys take a beautiful girl  
Oh, and they hide her away from the rest of the world  
Well, not me, I wanna be the one in the sun  
Girls, they wanna have fun  
Oh girls, they…”

“That's all they really want...  
Those girls, they wanna have fu

Finn and Puck stand up and go to walk away but Alexis and Santana stop them. “Thank you.” Santana says

“I’m sorry for what I said about that skank. I'm sure she was lovely.” Alexis says

“Nah she was crusty and smelt like cheese.” Puck says as they hug it out and they all laugh

“We love you two.” Finn says

In the hallway

Some jock leans up against the locker next to Alexis and Santana. “Saw the commercial. Smoking.” This jock says

“Who the fuck are you?” Santana asks

“Josh Comen. Sophomore rugby captain. Girls like you and freaks like him are a challenge you just need the guy and girl to straighten you two out”. He says

“Move you busted creeper ass.” Mercedes says

“Now.” Tina says

“Easy girls, I'm just trying to make them normal.” Josh says

“They are normal.” Brittany says

“It’s not their choice idiot but if it were you’d be our last.” Quinn says

“Oh, I get you’re all a bunch of lesbos and trannys.” Josh says

“Oh so what if we are? You don’t stand a chance either way. Bye bye walk away.” Rachel says

“This was never the way I planned  
Not my intention  
I got some brave, drink in hand  
Lost my discretion”

“It's not what  
I'm used to  
Just wanna try you on  
I'm curious for you  
Caught my attention”

“I kissed a girl and I liked it  
The taste of her cherry chapstick  
I kissed a girl just to try it  
I hope my boyfriend don't mind it  
It felt so wrong  
It felt so right  
Don't mean I'm in love tonight  
I kissed a girl and I like it  
I liked it”

“Us girls we are so magical  
Soft skin, red lips, so kissable  
Hard to resist, so touchable  
Too good to, to deny it  
Ain't no big deal, it's innocent”

“I kissed a girl and I liked it  
The taste of her cherry chapstick  
I kissed a girl just to try it  
I hope my boyfriend don't mind it  
It felt so wrong  
It felt so right  
Don't mean I'm in love tonight  
I kissed a girl and I like it  
I liked it”

“Okay, okay update y’all. I told my parents last night and they were actually okay with it.” Santana says

“No way.” Brittany says

“I just have to tell my Abuela before she sees that stupid commercial. Luckily she only watches Univision.” Santana says

“All right ladies and gentlemen grab a boy or grab a girl and get to slow dancing.” Alexis yells

“Earth angel, earth angel  
Will you be mine  
My darling dear, love you all the time  
I'm just a fool, a fool in love with you”

“Earth angel, earth angel  
The one I adore  
Love you forever, and ever more  
I'm just a fool, a fool in love with you”

“I fell for you and I knew  
The vision of your love, loveliness  
I hope and I pray that someday  
I'll be the vision of your happy, happiness”

“Oh earth angel, earth angel  
Please be mine  
My darling dear, love you all the time  
I'm just a fool, a fool in love with you”

“I fell for you and I knew  
The vision of your loveliness  
I hope and pray that someday  
I'll be the vision of your happiness”

“Earth angel, earth angel  
Please be mine  
My darling dear love you all the time  
I'm just a fool, a fool in love with you” 

“Excuse me New Directions and Troubletones singing groups. Mr Kurt Hummel I need to see you in my office immediately.” Figgins says

“I figured you guys may not get a chance to slow dance at senior prom so now you have.” Alexis says

“Well if I’m out I’m gonna be dancing with Britt at prom.” Santana says

That night

“You okay?” Alexis asks climbing in her window

“What are you doing here?” Santana asks

“I have some experience in breaking and entering. Now you gonna tell me what’s wrong?” Alexis asks again

“My Abuela disowned me.” Santana says

“Hey you don’t need her. Maybe one day she’ll come around but until then you just focus on yourself.” Alexis says

“Thanks Lexi.” Santana says as they hug

The next day

“Okay guys Shelby and I just wanted to say that you really inspired us.” Mr Shue says

“When we face off and sectionals it will be with more empathy and a deeper understanding of each other.” Shelby says

“That’s right. That's right!” Mr Shue says

“Mr Shue?” Kurt says

“Yeah?” Mr Shue says

“As the son of Ohio’s recently minted congressman and to dispel any lingering clouds of suspicion, I’d like to personally and publicly congratulate President Brittany. The people have spoken and they want you Britt. They want Pixy Stixs. Rule wisely. Rule fabulously.” Kurt says

“Thanks Kurt. You’re still the most unicorn of them all.” Brittany says

“Quinn are you okay?” Tina asks

“Santana, Alexis, will you bring us home?” Mr Shue asks

“Thanks Mr Shue.” Santana says

“So we picked a song that gives us strength and gets us through.” Alexis says

“The same way all of you do.” Santana says

“The struggle continues but at least we know we’re not alone.” Alexis says

“Even through the darkest phase  
Be it thick or thin  
Always someone marches brave  
Here beneath my skin”

“And constant (Constant) Craving (Craving)  
Has always (Always) Been”

“Maybe a great magnet pulls  
All souls to what's true  
Or maybe it is life itself  
Leads wisdom to its youth”

“Constant (Constant) Craving (Craving)  
Has always (Always) Been”

“Craving  
Ah...constant craving  
Has always been  
Has always been”

“Constant (Constant) Craving (Craving)  
Has always (Always) Been  
Constant (Constant) Craving (Craving)  
Has always (Always) Been”

“Craving  
Ah...constant craving  
Has always been  
Has always been  
Has always been  
Has always been  
Has always been  
Has always been  
Has always been  
Has always been”

Alexis then picks up a complex looking guitar and plays a random set of notes. “That has nothing to do with the next which is called ‘39.” She says chuckling. “You can sing along if you like.” She adds

“Sing along!” Santana yells jokingly

[Alexis and Santana with the New Directions and the Troubletones]  
“In the year of '39 assembled here the volunteers  
In the days when the lands were few  
Here the ship sailed out into the blue and sunny morn  
The sweetest sight ever seen.”

“And the night followed day  
And the story tellers say  
That the score brave souls inside  
For many a lonely day sailed across the milky seas  
Never looked back, never feared, never cried.”

“Don't you hear my call though you're many years away  
Don't you hear me calling you  
Write your letters in the sand  
For the day I take your hand  
In the land that our grandchildren knew.”

“In the year of '39 came a ship in from the blue  
The volunteers came home that day  
And they bring good news of a world so newly born  
Though their hearts so heavily weigh”

“For the earth is old and grey, little darling wellaway  
But my love this cannot be  
For so many years have gone though I'm older but a year  
Your mother's eyes from your eyes cry to me.”

“Don't you hear my call though you're many years away  
Don't you hear me calling you  
Write your letters in the sand  
For the day I take your hand  
In the land that our grandchildren knew.”

“Don't you hear my call though you're many years away  
Don't you hear me calling you  
All your letters in the sand cannot heal me like your hand”

“For my life  
Still ahead  
Pity me.”

“Thank you so very much all right!” Alexis yells as she plays the flourish

“Rachel?” Mr Shue ask as she walks in the door

“I just told principal Figgins that I was the one who stuffed the ballot box so Kurt would win. Kurt, please don’t hate me. You’re totally in the clear.” Rachel says

“What did he say?” Finn asks

“He said that he had no choice but to put it on my permanent record and that I’m suspended for a week. Also he said that I was banned from sectionals.” Rachel says


	8. Hold Onto Sixteen

“Everyone say hello to our secret weapons.” Shelby says as a 5’ 10” girl with red hair cut like Gerard Way on the Killjoys Make Some Noise tour with a bass guitar steps out from behind her

“Well hello dolly.” Alexis says shaking her hand

“Hi everyone, I'm Skye and I play bass.” She says

“Very nice to meet you. And now I don’t have to do my sound check alone.” Alexis says

In the auditorium

“So what are we doing for our setlist?” Skye asks

“Survivor / I Will Survive, Na Na Na, DESTROYA and Planetary (GO) for our showstopper. And I believe Miss Corcoran want you to take the lead.” Alexis says

“Well we don’t need to do a sound check for Survivor / I Will Survive so let’s start with Na Na Na and then move into DESTROYA and end with Planetary (GO).” Skye says taking her bass out of its case

The day of sectionals

In the choir room 

The Troubletones walk in silver dresses on, expect Alexis and Skye have silver tuxedos on as it’s easier to play a guitar that way. “We just came to say, may the best glee club win.” Shelby says

“Yes, and just in case that glee club is us, I have convinced Miss Corcoran to consider a contingency plan.” Santana says

“Yes in the event of a New Directions loss, Troubletones has voted to allow any of you to join us for regionals.” Shelby says

“You’re welcome.” Sugar says

“Excuse me?” Mr Shue asks

“That’s incredibly rude, Santana.” Finn says

“We’re being nice. It could be rude if I followed you around with Skye’s bass and every time you took a step I played the lowest I could go.” Santana says

“Thank you for the offer, Miss Corcoran, but right now, we’re gonna concentrate on winning this thing.” Mr Shue says

“And we will be winning Shelby. We’ve got it in the bag. Puck here is going to come through for us. He such a shining star, in every conceivable way. Don’t you think?” Quinn asks

“I wouldn’t be so sure of that Quinn. Our setlist is pretty strong.” Alexis says

“Good luck everybody. See you on the ice.” Shelby says

Gears start turning in Alexis’ head then it clicks. ‘Holy shit Puck’s sleeping with Miss Corcoran!’ She thinks to herself

In the auditorium 

“And now, the judges for this year’s Show Choir Sectional here and McKinley High. Department of Motor Vehicles Employee of the Month, Brandy Englebert! From the 11th District Court of Appeals, the Honorable Judge Dorothy Saunders! And Western Ohio’s Birthday Clown of the Year three years running, Tickles! And now let’s welcome our first performers. All the way from Defiance, Ohio, the Unitards.” The announcer says

“What's new Buenos Aires?  
I'm new, I wanna say I'm just a little stuck on you  
You'll be on me too”

“I get out here, Buenos Aires  
Stand back, you oughta know whatcha gonna get in me  
Just a little touch of star quality”

“Fill me up with your heat, with your noise  
With your dirt, overdo me  
Let me dance to your beat, make it loud  
Let it hurt, run it through me.  
All I want is a whole lot of excess  
Tell the singer this is where I'm playing”

“And if ever I go too far  
It's because of the things you are  
Beautiful town, I love you”

“You're a tramp, you're a treat  
You will shine to the death, you are shoddy  
But you're flesh, you are meat  
You shall have every breath in my body  
Put me down for a lifetime of success  
Give me credit, I'll find ways of paying”

“Stand back, Buenos Aires  
Because you oughta know whatcha gonna get in me  
Just a little touch of  
Just a little touch of  
Just a little touch of star quality”

“Ladies and gentlemen, from McKinley High, competing for the first time ever, The Troubletones!” The announcer says

“At first I was afraid, I was petrified  
Kept thinkin' I could never live without you by my side  
But then I spent so many nights thinking how you did me wrong  
And I grew strong  
And I learned how to get along”

“And so you're back from outer space  
I just walked in to find you here, with that sad look upon your face  
I should have changed that stupid lock  
I should have made you leave your key  
If I had known for just one second, you'd be back to bother me”

“oh now, go walk out the door  
Just turn around now  
Cause you're not welcome anymore  
Weren't you the one who tried to hurt me with goodbye?  
Did you think I'd crumble?  
Did you think I'd lay down and die?”

“I'm a survivor (What?)  
I'm not gon give up (What?)  
I'm not gon stop (What?)  
I'm gon work harder (What?)  
I'm a survivor (What?)  
I'm gonna make it (What?)  
I will survive (What?)  
Keep on survivin' (What?)”

“It took all the strength I had not to fall apart  
Kept trying hard to mend the pieces of my broken heart  
And I spent oh, so many nights just feeling sorry for myself  
I used to cry, but now I hold my head up high”

“I'm a survivor (What?)  
I'm not gon give up (What?)  
I'm not gon stop (What?)  
I'm gon work harder (What?)  
I'm a survivor (What?)  
I'm gonna make it (What?)  
I will survive (What?)  
Keep on survivin' (What?)”

“Thought I couldn't breathe without you  
I'm inhaling  
You thought I couldn't see without you  
Perfect vision  
You thought I couldn't last without you  
But I'm lastin'  
You thought that I would die without you  
But I'm livin'”

“Thought that I would fail without you  
But I'm on top  
Thought it would be over by now  
But it won't stop  
Thought that I would self destruct  
But I'm still here  
Even in my years to come  
I'm still gon be here”

“I'm a survivor (What?)  
I'm not gon give up (What?)  
I'm not gon stop (What?)  
I'm gon work harder (What?)  
I'm a survivor (What?)  
I'm gonna make it (What?)  
I will survive (What?)  
Keep on survivin' (What?)”

“I'm a survivor (What?)  
I'm not gon give up (What?)  
I'm not gon stop (What?)  
I'm gon work harder (What?)  
I'm a survivor (What?)  
I'm gonna make it (What?)  
I will survive (What?)  
Keep on survivin' (What?)”

“On no no I  
I will survive  
For as long as I know how to love, I know I'll stay alive  
I've got all my life to live  
And I've got all my love to give  
I'll survive  
I will survive  
Hey hey”

“I'm a survivor (What?)  
I'm not gon give up (What?)  
I'm not gon stop (What?)  
I'm gon work harder (What?)  
I'm a survivor (What?)  
I'm gonna make it (What?)  
I will survive (What?)  
Keep on survivin' (What?)”

“I will survive”

Alexis and Skye run out looking like female rockstars their guitars held by the neck

[Santana]  
“Look alive, sunshine  
One-oh-nine in the sky  
But the pigs won't quit  
You're here with me: Doctor Death-Defy  
I'll be your surgeon, your proctor, your helicopter  
Pumpin' out the slaughter-matic sounds  
To keep you live  
A system failure for the masses  
Anti-matter for the master-plan  
Louder than God's revolver  
And twice as shiny  
This one's for all you rock and rollers  
All you crash queens and motor babies  
Listen up!”

Alexis and Skye begin rocking out hard

[Alexis (The Troubletones)]  
“The future is bulletproof  
The aftermath is secondary  
It's time to do it now and do it loud  
Killjoys  
Make some noise”

“(na, na, na...)”

“Drugs, gimme drugs, gimme drugs  
I don't need it, but I'll sell what you got  
Take the cash and I'll keep it  
Eight legs to the wall  
Hit the gas, kill them all  
And we crawl, and we crawl, and we crawl  
You be my detonator”

“Love, gimme love, gimme love  
I don't need it, but I'll take what I want from your heart  
And I'll keep it in a bag, in a box  
Put an X on the floor  
Gimme more, gimme more, gimme more  
Shut up and sing it with me”

“(na, na, na...)”

“From mall security  
To every enemy  
We're on your property  
Standing in V formation”

“(na, na, na...)”

“Let's blow an artery  
Eat plastic surgery  
Keep your apology  
Give us more detonation”

“(More! Gimme more! Gimme more!)”

“Oh, let me tell you 'bout the sad man  
Shut up and let me see your jazz hands  
Remember when you were a madman  
Thought you was Batman  
And hit the party with a gas can  
Kiss me you animal”

“(na, na, na...)”

“You run the company  
Fuck like a Kennedy  
I think we'd rather be  
Burning your information”

“(na, na, na...)”

“Let's blow an artery  
Eat plastic surgery  
Keep your apology  
Give us more detonation”

“And right here  
Right now  
All the way in Battery City  
The little children  
Raise their open filthy palms  
Like tiny daggers up to heaven  
And all the juvee halls  
And the Ritalin rats  
Ask angels made from neon  
And fucking garbage  
Scream out, "What will save us?"  
And the sky opened up”

“Everybody wants to change the world  
Everybody wants to change the world  
But no one, no one wants to die  
Wanna try, wanna try, wanna try  
Wanna try, wanna try, now  
I'll be your detonator”

“Troubletones let me hear you! Now let me really hear you!” 

“(na, na, na...)”

“Make no apology  
It's death or victory  
On my authority  
Crash and burn  
Young and loaded”

“Drop like a bullet shell  
Dress like a sleeper cell  
I'd rather go to hell  
Than be in purgatory  
Cut my hair  
Gag and bore me  
Pull this pin  
Let this world explode”

As Skye and the band play the flourish Alexis switches from a yellow and white guitar with six in line tuning pegs and a misshapened body to her classic Les-Paul

[Alexis and Santana (The Troubletones)]  
“Check check  
Check check  
Check check check check check check check  
Check ch-“

“Don't believe what they say  
We're dead flies in the summertime  
They leave us all behind  
With duct tape scars on my honey”

“They don't like who you are  
You won't like where we'll go  
Brother, protect me now  
With blood they wash in the money!”

“You don't believe in God  
I don't believe in luck  
They don't believe in us  
But I believe we're the enemy!”

“You don't believe in God  
I don't believe in luck  
They don't believe in us  
But I believe we're the enemy!”

“Right now”

“I'm sick down from the bones to the other side  
Red-mob, where insects hide  
King rat on the streets in another life  
They laugh, we don't think it's funny”

“If what you are  
Is just what you own  
What have you become  
When they take from you almost everything”

“You don't believe in God  
I don't believe in luck  
They don't believe in us  
But I believe we're the enemy!”

“You don't believe in God  
I don't believe in luck  
They don't believe in us  
But I believe we're the enemy!”

“Destroya destroya destroya destroya destroya destroya  
Against the sun, we're the enemy  
Destroya destroya destroya destroya”

“I don't believe in God (you don't believe in God)  
I don't believe in luck (I don't believe in luck)  
I don't believe in you (They don't believe in us)  
I just believe we're the enemy (but I believe we're the enemy)”

“I don't believe in God (You don't believe in God)  
I don't believe in luck (I don't believe in luck)  
I don't believe in you (They don't believe in us)  
I just believe we're the enemy (but I believe we're the enemy)”

“You don't believe in God  
I don't believe in luck  
They don't believe in us  
But I believe we're the enemy!”

“You don't believe in God  
I don't believe in luck  
They don't believe in us  
But I believe we're the enemy!”

“Destroya destroya destroya destroya destroya destroya  
Against the sun we're the enemy!  
Destroya destroya  
We're all waiting for you  
Destroya destroya  
Against the sun we're the enemy!”

“So show me what you got, you children of the gun  
Don't hide and we don't run!  
(Destroya destroya well I'm waiting for you destroya destroya)  
Against the sun we're the enemy!  
So show me what you got, against the sun we're the enemy!  
(Destroya destroya destroya destroya)”

A siren begins sounding and Alexis taps her foot to the beat of the bass drum

[Skye (Alexis and the Troubletones)]  
“There might be something outside your window  
But you just never know  
There could be something right past the turnpike gates  
But you'll just never know”

“If my velocity starts to make you sweat,  
Then just don't let go  
And if the Heaven ain't got a vacancy  
Then we just, then we just, then we just  
Then we just get up and go!”

“Ladies and gentlemen:  
Truth is now acceptable  
Fame is now injectable  
Process the progress  
This core is critical  
Faith is unavailable  
Lives become incredible  
Now, please understand that,”

“I can't slow down  
I won't be waiting for you  
I can't stop now  
Because I'm dancing  
This planet's ours to defend  
Ain't got no time to pretend  
Don't fuck around,  
This is our last chance”

“If my velocity starts to make you sweat  
Then just don't let go  
'Cause the emergency room got no vacancy  
And we just, and we just, and we just  
And we just get up and go!”

“(Who) they want you to be  
(Who) they wanted to see  
(Go) kill the party with me  
And never go home  
(Who) they want you to be  
(Who) they wanted to see  
Just leave the party with me, and never go home”

“You're unbelievable  
Ah, so unbelievable  
Ah, you ruin everything  
Oh, you better go home  
I'm unbelievable  
Yeah, I'm undefeatable  
Yeah, let's ruin everything,  
Blast it to the back row”

“They're sell-presentable  
Young, and so ingestible  
Sterile and collectible  
Safe, and I can't stand it  
This is a letter my word  
Is the Beretta  
The sound of my vendetta  
Against the ones who planned it”

“If my velocity starts to make you sweat  
Then just don't let go  
'Cause the emergency room got no vacancy  
Tell me who do you trust,  
Do you trust  
And we just  
Get up and go!”

“(Who) they want you to be  
(Who) they wanted to see  
(Go) kill the party with me  
And never go home  
(Who) they want you to be  
(Who) they wanted to see  
Just leave the party with me, and never go home”

“You keep eternity,  
Give us the radio  
Deploy the battery,  
We're taking back control  
Engage the energy,  
Light up the effigy  
No chance to take it slow,  
By now I'm sure you  
Know, know, know, know, know, know  
(1, 2, 3, go!)  
Get up and go!”

“(Who) they want you to be  
(Who) they wanted to see  
(Go) kill the party with me  
And never go home  
(Who) they want you to be  
(Who) they wanted to see  
Just leave the party with me, and never go home”

“Are we still having fun?  
Are you holding the gun?  
Take the money and run  
We'll never go home”

“I've got nothing to lose  
You've got nothing to say  
And we're leaving today  
We'll never go home”

“I think I better go now  
I think I better go now  
I think I better go now  
Gonna go now, gonna go now, gonna go now, gonna go now  
Go now, gonna go now  
Go home!”

“Kiss me.” Alexis says

“What?” Skye says

“Kiss me they’ll love it.” Alexis says as their lips smash together it’s was like Alexis had been electrocuted but the crowd love it

“Also from McKinley High, let’s give it up for the New Directions.” The announcer says

[Tina:] “A buh-buh buh buh-buh  
[New Directions:] A buh-buh buh buh-buh”

[Tina:]  
“You went to school to learn, girl  
Things you never, never knew before”

[Kurt:]  
“Like I before E except after C”

[Tina:]  
“And why two plus two makes four  
Now, now, now I'm gonna teach you ([ND:] Teach you, teach you)  
All about love, dear, ([ND:] All about love)”

[Mike:]  
“Sit yourself down, take a seat  
All you gotta do is repeat after me”

[Tina with New Directions]  
“A B C, easy as one, two, three  
Are simple as do re mi  
A B C, one, two, three, baby, you and me girl  
A B C, easy as one, two, three ([Quinn:] Ohhhh)  
Are simple as do re mi  
A B C, one, two, three, baby, you and me girl”

[Tina:]  
“([New Directions:] Come on, let me love you just a little bit)  
Come on, let me love you just a little bit  
([New Directions:] Teach, teach, sing it out) Come on, come one, come on  
Let me show you what it's all about”

[Quinn:]  
“Reading and writing arithmetic  
Are the branches of the learning tree”

[Mike:]  
“But listen without the roots of love let me tell you, girl”

[Kurt:]  
“Your education ain't complete”

[Tina:]  
“T-t-t-teacher's gonna show you, ([ND:] show you, show you)  
How to get an A, ([New Directions:] Nah nah nah nah naah)”

[Mike:]  
“Spell me, you, add the two  
Listen to me baby, that's all you gotta do”

[Tina with New Directions:]  
“A B C is easy as one, two, three  
Are simple as do re mi  
A B C, one, two, three, baby, you and me girl  
A B C is easy as like counting up to three ([Quinn:] Ohhhh)  
Sing a simple melody  
That's how easy love can be  
That's how easy love can be  
Sing a simple melody ([New Directions:] That's how easy love can be)  
One, two, three, you and me”

[Kurt:]  
“Sit down girl I think I love you”

[Mike:]  
“No, get up girl show me what you can do!”

[Tina with New Directions:]  
“Shake it, shake it, baby, ([Mike:] come on now)  
Shake it, shake it, baby, ([Kurt:] ooh-ooh)  
Shake it, shake it, baby,  
One, two, three baby oo  
A B C baby  
do re mi baby  
That's how easy love can be  
A B C is easy as like counting up to three ([Quinn:] Ohhhh)  
Sing a simple melody  
That's how easy love can be”

[Mike:]  
“Now I'm gonna teach you how to sing it out,  
Come on, come on, come on, let me show you what it's all about  
A B C it's easy it's like counting up to three ([Quinn:] Ohhhh)  
Sing a simple melody  
That's how easy love can be”

[Mike:]  
“Now I'm gonna teach you how to  
Sing it out, sing it out, sing it out, sing it out”

[Tina with New Directions:]  
“A B C is easy it's like counting up to three  
Sing a simple melody  
That's how easy love can be”

[Mike:]  
“Now I'm gonna teach you how to  
Sing it out, sing it out, easy as one, two, three”

“This is a story about control  
My control  
Control of what I say  
Control of what I do  
And this time I'm gonna do it my way  
I hope you enjoy this as much as I do  
Are we ready?  
I am  
'Cause it's all about control  
And I've got lots of it”

“When I was 17 I did what people told me, uhh  
I did what my father said, and let my mother mold me  
But that was long ago again”

“Control  
Now I've got a lot  
Control  
To get what I want  
Control  
Never gonna stop  
Control  
To get what I want  
Control  
I got to have a lot  
Control  
Now I'm all grown up”

“First time I fell in love, I didn't know what hit me  
So young and so naive, I thought it would be easy  
But now I know I got to take”

“Control  
Now I've got a lot  
Control  
To get what I want  
Control  
Never gonna stop  
Control  
Now I'm all grown up”

“Jam, woooh woooh  
Rebel, that's right  
I'm on my own  
I'll call my own shots  
Thank you”

“Got my own mind  
I wanna make my own decisions  
When it has to do with my life, my life  
I wanna be the one in control”

“So let me take you by the hand, and lead you on this dance  
It's what I got, because I took a chance  
I don't wanna rule the world, just wanna run my life, Ooh  
So make your life a little easier  
When you get the chance just take”

“Control, ooh ooh  
Now I've got a lot, ooh  
Control  
To get what I want  
Control  
I'm never gonna stop  
Control  
Now I'm all grown up, ow!”

“Free at last  
I'm here on my own  
Ooh ooh ooh yeah, eee  
Now control this, uhh”

“Cause I've got my own mind  
Gonna make my own decisions  
When it has to do with my life  
I wanna be the one in control”

“I'm in control  
Uhh  
I'm in control  
Ahh  
I'm in control  
Uhh  
I'm in control  
Ahh”

[Finn:]  
“I'm gonna make a change, for once in my life”

[Finn and Sam:]  
“It's gonna feel real good, gonna make a difference”

[Finn:]  
“Gonna make it right…”

[Puck:]  
“As I, turn up the collar on my favorite winter coat  
This wind is blowin' my mind”

[Blaine and Artie:]  
“I see the kids in the street, with not enough to eat  
Who am I, to be blind?  
Pretending not to see their needs”

[Sam:]  
“A summer's disregard, a broken bottle top  
And a one man's soul”

[Artie:]  
“They follow each other on the wind ya' know”

[Artie and Blaine:]  
“'Cause they got nowhere to go”

[Artie:]  
“That's why I want you to know”

[Finn with New Directions:]  
“I'm starting with the man in the mirror  
I'm asking him to change his ways  
And no message could have been any clearer  
If you wanna make the world a better place  
Take a look at yourself, and then make that change”

[New Directions harmonizing:]  
“Nanana nanana nana  
([Artie:] O oh...)”

[Blaine:]  
“I’ve been a victim of a selfish kinda love  
It's time that I realize”

[Blaine and Artie:]  
“There are some with no home,”

[Blaine:]  
“Not a nickel to loan  
Could it be, really mean,”

[Blaine and Artie:]  
“Pretending that they're not alone?”

[Mike:]  
“A willow deeply scarred ([ND:] scarred), somebody's broken heart ([ND:] heart)  
And a washed out dream  
[New Directions:]  
(Washed out dream)”

[Puck:]  
“They follow the pattern of the wind ya see”

[Puck and Finn:]  
“'Cause they got no place to be that's why I'm starting with me”

[Finn with New Directions:]  
“I'm starting with the man in the mirror  
I'm asking him to change his ways  
And no message could have been any clearer  
If you wanna make the world a better place  
Take a look at yourself, and then make that change”

[Finn with Artie and New Directions:]  
“I'm starting with the man in the mirror ([New Directions:] Oh yeah)  
I'm asking him to change his ways ([Artie:] change his ways)  
And no message could have been any clearer ([New Directions:] Ooh ooh)  
If you wanna make the world a better place  
Take a look at yourself, and then make a change ([Artie:] Come on!)”

[New Directions:]  
“You got to get it right, when you got the time  
'Cause when you close your ([Artie:] You can't), then you close your  
([Artie:] Your) mind!”

[Finn and New Directions:]  
“I'm starting with the man in the mirror ([New Directions:] Oh yeah)  
I'm asking him to change his ways  
And no message could have been any clearer ([New Directions:] Ooh ooh)  
If you wanna make the world a better place  
Take a look at yourself, and then make that change”

[Artie:]  
“Stand up!  
Stand up! ([New Directions:] Make a change!)  
Stand up!  
Stand up!”

[Finn:]  
“Left, yourself now!  
[New Directions (Tina & Quinn harmonizing):]  
Man in the mirror!  
([Artie:] Ooh!)  
([Artie:] Ooh!) Ah aaah  
([Artie:] Ooh!) ah aaah  
Make that change! ([Artie:] Stand up! Stand up!)”

[Sam:]  
“You know!  
You Know!  
You Know! ([New Directions:] Man in the mirror!)  
You Know!”

[New Directions:]  
“Change!”

[Mike:]  
“Make that change.”

In the Troubletones choir room

“Well we give it our all. And I couldn’t be happier. I always wanted to play that song and now I have.” Alexis says

Later in the auditorium

“As an award winning clown, I’d like to say how nice it is, for once to work with kids who are just sick with talent. Third place The Unitards! In second place.” Tickles says pausing for dramatic effect for what seems like hours till he finally says. “The Troubletones and first place New Directions!”

“Fuck!” Alexis curses as time just seems to freeze and their stuck there even as the the lights in the auditorium click off

In the girls bathroom

“We were better.” Mercedes says

“I don’t know, I could’ve gone either way.” Brittany says

“It was that damn Trouty Mouth. Even I felt a little something in my lady loins when he did that magic sex dance.” Santana says

“I hit those notes.” Alexis says

“What are we gonna do?” Skye asks

“All right, ladies, girl talk.” Quinn says

“No. Uh-uh. Don’t you dare try and give us a pep talk.” Santana says

“Or ask us to come back to New Directions not interested.” Mercedes says

“Wait is it even possible? Do you think they would really take us back?” Brittany asks

“Of course they would take us back. But I’m telling you I’m not going”. Mercedes says

“Right time to figure out what I’m doing till the end of the year.” Skye says

“Do you know what growing up is about? Losing things. In six months we're all gonna be gone, scattered.” Quinn says

“We’ll keep in touch.” Mercedes says

“Yeah, but it won’t be the same. When we see each other, it’ll be on special occasions. It’ll be different. I don’t want to grow up yet. I’m not ready to lose you girls.” Quinn days

“What are we supposed to do? Come back to Glee Club and sing and play background for Blaine and Berry until we graduate? We’re not doing that again. We know what it feels like to be out front now.” Mercedes says

“What if Mr. Shue agreed to let Troubletones sing at least one number per competition?” Quinn asks

“I’d laugh and say Rachel would never go for that.” Alexis says

“Yeah even if Mr Shue agreed to that, Rachel never would.” Santana says

“What if I told you they already did?” Quinn says

“I’m listening.” Mercedes says folding her arms

“Look, I know I went a little crazy. But I’m here now. I’m 17, I have the rest of my life in front of me. I love Glee Club. I love you girls. And when we’re 27, or 87, I want us to be able to look back on these next couple of months and talk about how it was the best time of our lives. Can’t do that if we’re not all together. We’re doing a big number in the auditorium to celebrate our victory and to prepare for regionals. We could use a few more girl voices. Let me know if you hear about anyone who might want to join.” Quinn says before walking about

In the auditorium

[Rachel:]  
“Give me a second, I, I need to get my story straight  
My friends are in the bathroom getting higher than the Empire State  
My lover he’s waiting for me just across the bar  
My seat’s been taken by some sunglasses asking bout a scar, and”

[Finn:]  
“I know I gave it to you months ago  
I know you’re trying to forget  
But between the drinks and subtle things  
The holes in my apologies, you know  
I’m trying hard to take it back”

[Sam:]  
“So if by the time the bar closes”

[Sam and Quinn:]  
“And you feel like falling down  
I’ll carry you home”

[Finn, Rachel and New Directions:]  
“Tonight  
We are young  
So let’s set the world on fire  
We can burn brighter than the sun”

[Santana, Mercedes, Alexis, Skye, Brittany and Sugar:]  
“Tonight  
We are young  
So let’s set the world on fire  
We can burn brighter than the sun”

[Santana:]  
“Now I know that I'm not all that you got  
I guess that I  
I just thought maybe we could find new ways to fall apart”

[Rachel:]  
“But our friends are back  
So let's raise a cup  
'Cause I found someone to carry me home”

[Finn w/ New Directions:]  
“Tonight  
We are young  
So let’s set the world on fire  
We can burn brighter than the sun”

[Mercedes:]  
“Whoa”

[New Directions:]  
“Tonight  
We are young  
So let’s set the world on fire  
We can burn brighter than the sun”

[Quinn w/ New Directions]  
“Carry me home tonight (Nananananana)  
Just carry me home tonight (Nananananana)  
Carry me home tonight (Nananananana)  
Just carry me home tonight (Nananananana)”

[New Directions Boys:]  
“The world is on my side  
I have no reason to run  
So will someone come and carry me home tonight”

[Santana and Alexis:]  
“The angels never arrived  
But I can hear the choir  
So will someone come and carry me home”

[Rachel:]  
“Tonight  
We are young  
So let’s set the world on fire  
We can burn brighter than the sun”

[Mercedes:]  
“We are young, yeah”

[New Directions:]  
“Tonight  
We are young  
So let’s set the world on fire  
We can burn brighter than the sun”

[Rachel and Finn:]  
“So if by the time the bar closes  
And you feel like falling down  
I’ll carry you home tonight”

“Santana help I’m having referred to as a gay panic.” Alexis says 

“What’s wrong?” Santana asks

“I think no, I know I’m in love.” Alexis says

“With who?” She asks

“Who do you think? Is it really not obvious?” Alexis asks

“Oh Skye. She likes you too.” Santana says

“Don’t fuck with my heart.” Alexis says

“Ask her out right now.” Santana says

“Fine.” Alexis huffs

“Hey Lexi.” Skye says

“Hey Skye. I was wondering if you want to go on a date with me sometime.” Alexis stutters rubbing the back of her neck nervously

“Yes dummy.” Skye says hugging her

“Well that was easy.” Alexis says


	9. Yes or No

In the choir room

“Finn give me a drum roll!” Mr Shue yells and Finn obliges as they all clamour to figure out what Mr. Shue was writing. “Yes, I am finally proposing to Miss Pilsbury. This is the kind of new you share and you guys are my family.” He says

“Mr Shue we’re so happy for you.” Finn says

“We totally think you won’t screw it up this time.” Quinn says

“Here’s the thing: it’s got to be perfect. I’m sitting down with Emma’s parents to ask for permission, and then this proposal needs to knock her well washed socks off. And that where you guys come in, okay? So the assignment for the week is to come up with a proposal number. And you know Miss. Pillsbury it’s got to be perfect.” Mr Shue says

“Well, you can count on us, Mr. Shue.” Artie says

In the hallway

“Hey Skye babe can you meet me in the auditorium tomorrow?” Alexis asks

“Sure.” Skye says

“Great you’re not gonna regret it.” Alexis says

In Mr. Shue’s office

“Hey Mr Shue can you come to the auditorium tomorrow for my pitch for the assignment?” Alexis asks

“Sure.” Mr Shue says

The next day in the auditorium

“All right Alexis show me what we got.” Mr. Shue says

“Gravity  
Don't mean too much to me  
I'm who I've got to be  
These pigs are after me, after you  
Run away, like it was yesterday  
And we could run away, if we could run away  
Run away from here”

“I got a bulletproof heart  
You got a hollow-point smile  
Me and your runaway scars  
Got a photograph dream on the getaway mile”

“Let's blow a hole in this town  
And do our talking with a laser beam  
Gunning out of this place in a bullet's embrace  
Then we'll do it again”

“How can they say,  
"Jenny could you come back home?"  
'Cause everybody knows you don't  
Ever wanna come back  
Let me be the one to save you”

“Gravity  
Don't mean too much to me  
I'm who I've got to be  
These pigs are after me, after you  
Run away, like it was yesterday  
When we could run away, when we could run away  
Run away from here”

“I'm shooting out of this room  
Because I sure don't like the company  
Stop your preaching right there  
'Cause I really don't care  
And I'll do it again”

“So get me out of my head  
'Cause it's getting kinda cramped you know  
Coming ready or not  
When the motor gets hot  
We can do it again”

“The papers say,  
"Johnny won't you come back home?  
'Cause everybody knows you don't  
Wanna give yourself up, tell the truth  
And God will save you."

“Gravity  
Don't mean too much to me  
I'm who I've got to be  
These pigs are after me, after you  
Run away, like it was yesterday  
And we could run away, if we could run away  
Run away from here”

“And though I know how much you hate this  
Are you gonna be the one to save us  
From the black and hopeless feeling?  
Will you mean it when the end comes reeling?”

“Hold your heart into this darkness  
Will it ever be the light to shine you out  
Or fail and leave you stranded?  
I ain't gonna be the one left standing  
You ain't gonna be the one left standing  
We ain't gonna be the ones left standing”

“Gravity  
Don't mean too much to me  
Is this our destiny?  
This world is after me, after you  
Run away, like it was yesterday  
And we could run away,  
Run away, run away  
Run away from here”

“Yeah  
Away from here  
Away from here”

“That’s really great but it’s a little too angry for my taste. It’s in the mix though.” Mr Shue says

In the choir room

“Hey Artie we wanted to talk to you about something.” Finn says

“We think you need a Becky-vention.” Tina says

“You were spotted by Skye and Alexis having dinner with her at Breadstixs.” Quinn says

“So?” Artie asks

“So, it’s a little weird.” Santana says

“Seriously, dude, what’s your angle?” Puck asks

“I don’t have an angle. She asked me if I wanted to go to Breadsticks, and I said ‘yes’ and I had a good time.” Artie says

“Look, we think it’s great that you’re being so, so nice to Becky.” Rachel says

“I don’t. I know that girl. That girls a sly, conniving bitch.” Santana says

“We just think you should be careful.” Mercedes says

“Yeah, you don’t want to lead her on. I mean, she’s gonna think that you want.” Finn says

“What is she gonna think? That she's fun to be around, that I had a good time hanging out with her? You guys talk a good game about how it’s okay to be different, how it’s what’s on the inside that counts, but I think you’re just as narrow minded as the rest of this school. I liked spending time with Becky. She knows what it’s like to be trapped in a disability. She doesn’t care what people think of us. She’s really optimistic about life, which is really amazing considering what life has handed her.” Artie says

“Artie yesterday she kicked me in the crotch to see if it was still there!” Alexis yell as Artie wheels out

The next day in the choir room

“I can't win, I can't reign  
I will never win this game  
Without you, without you”

“I won't run, I won't fly  
I will never make it by  
Without you, without you  
I can't rest, I can't fight  
All I need is you and I,  
Without you, without you”

“Oh oh oh!  
You! You! You!  
Without  
You! You! You!  
Without you”

“I can't erase, so I'll take blame  
But I can't accept that we're estranged  
Without you, without you”

“I won't soar, I won't climb  
If you're not here, I'm paralyzed  
Without you, without you  
I can't look, I'm so blind  
I lost my heart, I lost my mind  
Without you, without you”

“Oh oh oh!  
You! You! You!  
Without you”

“I am lost, I am vain,  
I will never be the same  
Without you, without you  
Without you”

“Nice.” Mr Shue says as everyone claps

“You know I just wanted to say you blew that song out of the water and totally nailed the assignment. Oh, no, wait, wait a second. Was? The assignment wasn’t ‘make everything about Rachel Berry and force everyone else to watch’ was it?” Santana says

“Easy, Santana. It’s fine. That was beautiful Rachel.” Mr Shue says 

“So, Mr. Shue, what do you think? We've given you a bevy of songs from upbeat and awesome to emo and the very stretched limits of a love song to a little overwrought in my taste.” Artie says

“They’ve all been incredible guys. I think I just need a little more time to consider my options.” Mr Shue says

In the pool

[Rachel:]  
“Yellow diamonds in the light  
Now we're standing side by side  
As your shadow crosses mine  
What it takes to come alive  
It's the way I’m feeling I just can't deny  
But I've gotta let it go”

[Santana and Rachel:]  
“We found love in a hopeless place  
We found love in a hopeless place  
We found love in a hopeless place  
We found love in a hopeless place”

[Santana:]  
“Shine a light through an open door  
Love and life I will divide  
Turn away cause I need you more  
Feel the heartbeat in my mind”

[Rachel:]  
“It's the way I'm feeling I just can't deny  
([New Directions:] I just can't deny)”

[Rachel with New Directions:]  
“But I’ve gotta let it go   
Ooh”

[Santana and Rachel with New Directions:]  
“We found love in a hopeless place  
We found love in a hopeless place  
We found love in a hopeless place  
We found love in a hopeless place”

[Rachel:]  
“Yellow diamonds in the light   
([Santana:] In the light)  
And we're standing side by side   
([Santana:] Oh)  
As your shadow”

[Rachel with Santana:]  
“Crosses mine…”

[Santana:]  
“We found love!”

[Rachel with New Directions:]  
“We found love in a hopeless place  
([Santana:] Ooh)  
We found love in a hopeless place  
([Santana:] In a hopeless place)  
We found love in a hopeless place  
([Santana:] Oooh-ooh)  
We found love in a hopeless place  
([Santana:] Hopeless place)”

[Rachel:]  
“We found love!”

[Rachel and Santana with New Directions:]  
“We found love in a hopeless place  
([Santana:] Ohoh)  
We found love in a hopeless place  
([Santana:] We found love)  
We found love in a hopeless place  
([Rachel:] Ooh)  
([Rachel and Santana:] We found love)  
We found love in a hopeless place” as the song ends they all swim over to the edge by where Miss Pilsbury is sat 

“Emma you are the one. You always have been. The truth is I feel like I’ve had to stop myself from doing it the second i first met you. The first time I held this hand, it felt like I’d held it a million times before. Like somehow, it’s always been here. Life is messy. It just is. And I know it’s hard for you, but they why you have me to balance things out. But you have to realise you do that to me too. Every day. Loving you and being loved by you makes everything better. I love you with everything I am and everything I hope to be. So … Emma Pilsbury… will you do me the honour of becoming my wife?” Mr Shue says producing a ring box and getting done on one knee.

“I love you so much.” Miss Pilsbury says

“Is that yes?” Mr Shue asks

“Yes. Yes.” Miss Pilsbury says everyone cheers and celebrates


	10. Michael

“Admit it, Wondertwins, the only reason why The Troubletones lost at Sectionals is because that pervy clown judge was freakin’ high as a kite.” Santana says

“And you guys did MCR we did Michael Jackson. But that was weeks ago, why are you still obsessing?” Kurt asks

“One word, Kurt: Micheal.” Mercedes says

“You guys, fear not the world famous Cirque du Soleil tour tribute show, Immortal, to Micheal Jackson is coming to Columbus in June. We should all go.” Blaine says

“You don’t get it. I don’t want to see the spectacle that is Micheal, I want to be the spectacle.” Mercedes says

“Hey guys. Everything okay?” Mr Shue asks

“Look, we love being back in New Directions, but we hate that we missed our one chance to do Micheal.” Mercedes says

“Yeah, I get it. You know, I’ve been thinking a lot about Regionals and maybe we can do Micheal again.” Mr Shue says

“Well I for one know exactly what song we should start Micheal week with.” Blaine says tosses his bag on the floor and the intro to Wanna Be Starting Something plays

“I said you wanna be startin' somethin'  
You got to be startin' somethin'  
I said you wanna be startin' somethin'  
You got to be startin' somethin'”

“It's too high to get over (yeah, yeah)  
You're too low to get under (yeah, yeah)  
You're stuck in the middle (yeah, yeah)  
And the pain is thunder (yeah, yeah)  
It's too high to get over (yeah, yeah)  
You're too low to get under (yeah, yeah)  
You're stuck in the middle (yeah, yeah)  
And the pain is thunder (yeah, yeah)”

“I took my baby to the doctor with a fever  
But nothing he found  
By the time this hit the street  
They said she had a breakdown  
Someone's always tryin' to start my baby cryin'  
Talkin', squealin', lyin'  
Sayin' you just wanna be startin' somethin'  
I said you wanna be startin' somethin'  
You got to be startin' somethin'  
I said you wanna be startin' somethin'  
You got to be startin' somethin'”

“It's too high to get over (yeah, yeah)  
Too low to get under (yeah, yeah)  
You're stuck in the middle (yeah, yeah)  
And the pain is thunder (yeah, yeah)  
It's too high to get over (yeah, yeah)  
Too low to get under (yeah, yeah)  
You're stuck in the middle (yeah, yeah)  
And the pain is thunder (yeah, yeah)”

“You're a vegetable (You're a vegetable)  
You're a vegetable (You're a vegetable)  
Still they hate you (Still they hate you)  
You're a vegetable (You're a vegetable)  
You're just a buffet (You're just a buffet)  
You're a vegetable (You're a vegetable)  
They eat off of you (They eat off of you)  
You're a vegetable”

“Lift your head up high and scream out to the world  
I know I am someone, and let the truth unfurl  
No one can hurt you now because you know what's true  
Yes, I believe in me, so do believe in you”

“Help me sing it  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa”

“Help me sing it babe  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa”

“Sing it to the world, sing it out loud  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa”

“Help me sing it  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa”

“Help me sing it  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa”

“Sing it to the world  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa  
Ma Ma Se, Ma Ma Sa, Ma Ma Coo Sa”

In the Lima Bean

“Okay favourite Michael Jackson memory. Go.” Blaine says

“When I was one my mom showed me the VHS tape of his Motown special, and when he moonwalked across the stage for the first time in history I uttered my first words. ‘Hot Damn’ it was awesome.” Artie says

“I owe the king of pop a deep debt of gratitude. He’s the first one to pull off a sequined military jacket, long before one Kurt Hummel made it iconic.” Kurt says

“I have to be honest I never really got him.” Rachel says

“And we are no longer on speaking terms” Artie said looking over the top of his glasses. 

“No, I think he’s an amazing performer, but I’ve never really gotten what he’s about.” Rachel says

“Rachel, he is best friends with Liza Minnelli and Liz Taylor.” Kurt says

“No all I’m saying is that I-I just … I haven’t connected with home the way I connected with the likes of Barbara or either of the Stephens. Sondheim. Schwartz.” Rachel says

“I’d throw this mocha in your face but it's not nearly scalding enough.” Santana says

“Okay, but just, since you guys are so jazzed about him, I think it’s a good idea.” Da bel says

“Well that might not be the best idea. Hey Blaine, Santana, Alexis hello everyone else” Sebastian says walking over to the groups table

“Does he live here or something? Seriously you are always here.” Kurt says not looking at Sebastian

“Why don’t you think that’s a good idea?” Artie asks

“Because we're doing MJ for regionals. You see Warblers drew first position, so as soon as I heard what your plant was I changed our setlist accordingly.” Sebastian says

“I’m sorry how… how did you hear?” Rachel asks setting her coffee cup down on the table a little more forceful than intended

“Uh, Blaine told me this morning. I just called for a tip on how to get red wine out of my blazer piping and he would not stop going on about it.” Sebastian says

“I may have mentioned it.” Blaine states quietly

“How often do you talk?” Kurt asks in an accusatory tone

“Oh my god, hey Kurt. I didn’t recognise you. You are wearing your boy clothes for once.” Sebastian says with utter malice

“All right twink, I think it’s me and my friend here, show you a little Lima Heights hospitality. Santana says as she and Alexis stand up

“Unless you want to join your relatives in prison, that’s probably not the best idea. You see, my dad's sort of what you’d call a state’s attorney. But either of you had a piñata you wanted delivered, I bet he could make sure that got to them. All right, so here’s what you need to know. I am captain of the Warblers now, and I’m tired of playing nice.” Sebastian says smiling sweetly

In the choir room

“There has to be some kind of show choir competition committee we can complain to.” Tina says

“What happened?” Skye asks

“So the Warblers pilfered our Michael which mm mm not okay.” Artie says rolling in

“I’m not exactly comfortable with Blaine in the room. Clearly once a Warbler, always a Warbler.” Puck says

“Uh, wh-what?” Blaine stutters out

“Dude you told them what we were gonna do. You’re like a modern day Egg Benedict. He’s on notice as far as I’m concerned.” Puck says

“We should all be on notice. I mean, next Vocal Adrenaline, the Warblers are the best Glee Club in the state, and for a lot of us this is our last shot at a championship, so we should stop complaining about the Warblers and figure how to beat them.” Finn says

“Couldn’t have said it better myself, Finn. I’m less worried about our setlist right now and more interested in getting us in the right mindset to crush those guys.” Mr Shue says as he walks up to the board and writes WWMJD? on it “and that is why our lesson for the week is What Would Michael Jackson Do?” Mr Shue continues

“He’d fight back. He’d say Regionals is ours, MJ is ours, and if they want it they can pry it from our sequinned gloved hand.” Finn says

“Mm-hmm. Straight up. In 1983 MTV refused to air his ‘Billie Jean’ video. What’d he do? He fought back. They aired it and the Thriller album sold an additional ten million copies.” Artie says

“That’s right.” Mr Shue says

“I know what Michael would do. I think he would take it to the streets.” Blaine says pulling out a black jacket out of his bag

Santana and Blaine stand with their backs to a parking column they pull their hoods up as the Warblers walk in “Well we’re here.” Sebastian says with swagger that he doesn’t have

“We got something to settle.” Blaine says crossing his arms “both of us wanna use MJ but only one can.” Blaine says

“So we’re having Jackson-off Nick at Nite. Winner gets the King of Pop for Regionals.” Santana says

“What is against the two of you?” Sebastian chuckles “you really think you’re that bad? That what they teach you at that little public school of yours?” He leers 

“It’s time to see who’s bad.” Blaine says smirking Santana snaps her fingers as the rest of New Directions come out of the shadows. Blaine and Santana pull down their hoods

[Artie:]  
“Your butt is mine  
Gonna tell you right  
Just show your face  
In broad daylight  
I'm telling you  
On how I feel  
Gonna hurt your mind  
Don't shoot to kill  
Come on, Come on,  
Lay it on me  
All right  
Your lyin' eyes  
Gonna tell you right  
So listen up  
Don't make a fight,  
Your talk is cheap  
You're not a man  
You're throwin' stones  
To hide your hands”

[Blaine:]  
“Well they say the sky's the limit  
And to me that's really true  
But my friend you have seen nothin'  
Just wait 'till I get through”

[Santana and The New Directions]  
“Because I'm bad, I'm bad - come on  
(Bad bad - really, really bad)  
You know I'm bad, I'm bad - you know it  
(Bad bad - really, really bad)  
You know I'm bad, I'm bad - come on, you know  
(Bad bad - really, really bad)  
And the whole world has to answer right now  
Just to tell you once again,  
Who's bad?”

“Woo! Woo! Woo!”

[Santana and The New Directions:]  
“You know I'm bad, I'm bad - come on  
(Bad, bad - really, really bad)  
You know I'm bad, I'm bad - you know it - you know it  
(Bad bad - really, really bad)  
You know, you know, you know - come on  
(Bad bad - really, really bad)  
And the whole world has to answer right now  
(And the whole world has to answer right now)  
Just to tell you  
(Just to tell you once again)”

“You know I'm bad, I'm bad - you know it  
(Bad bad - really, really bad)  
You know I'm bad - you know - hoo!  
(Bad bad - really, really bad)  
You know I'm bad - I'm bad - you know it, you know  
(Bad bad - really, really bad)  
And the whole world has to answer right now  
(And the whole world has to answer right now)  
Just to tell you once again...  
(Just to tell you once again...)  
Who's bad?”

As the song ends a slushie flies at Kurt and Blaine jumps in the way as the slushie hits him he falls to the ground groaning in pain.

The next morning

“Kurt how is he?” Rachel asks

“It’s his right eye, his cornea is deeply scratched and he’ll need surgery.” Kurt says walking in

“In all my years as a teacher and student, I have never known a slushie to do that kind of damage.” Mr Shue says

“That’s ‘cause it wasn’t a normal slushie Mr Shue. There was stuff in it, like rocks or something. He wanted to do that damage.” Alexis says. “I saw it with my own eyes.” 

“I mean unless you have proof that he tampered with the slushie the police aren’t willing to get involved.” Mr Shue says

“Sebastian is evil, he needs to be expelled.” Kurt says

“Look Figgins and I spoke to Dalton's headmaster. They are opening up an investigation. So, guys I’m telling you, please let the system handle this one.” Mr Shue says

“No Dalton's old school Mr Shue they’re not gonna turn their back on one of their own we need payback.” Artie says

“An eye for an eye” Mike says

“No, I have a zero tolerance policy for violence, of any kind. That is not how we do things around here.” Mr Shue says forcefully but calmly

“No we sing and that's all we ever do.” Artie snaps

“Do you wanna get disqualified from Regionals?!” Mr Shue shouts at Artie

“I don’t give a damn about Regionals!” Artie shouts back at Mr Shue. “What do you expect from us we’re people I know the rest of the world may not see us like that but when they tease us and throw stuff at us and toss us in dumpsters and tell us we’re nothing but losers with stupid dreams it freaking hurts. And we’re supposed to turn the other cheek and be the bigger man by telling ourselves that those dreams and how hard we work make us better than them. But it gets pretty damn hard to win when they always get to win.” Artie yells

“I get how upsetting this is for you.” Mr Shue says

“No you don’t, and give me any of that ‘it gets better’ crap because I’m not interested in it getting better. I want it to be better like right now. I wanna hurt them the way they hurt us no, worse. I want them to feel my pain because frankly that's all I have left to give.” Artie yells

“Artie, take a break.” Mr Shue says calmly “we’ll be here when you get back.” Everyone sits there as Artie has a fantasy. “Artie, Artie?” Mr Shue says

“I think I better roll away.” Artie says wheeling out of the classroom

As Quinn sings Never Can Say Goodbye Alexis can feel sexual tension between Rachel and Quinn and the way Finn was giving Quinn a death stare means something happened in that love triangle and it hasn’t fallen in Finn’s favour. “Wow, Quinn, that was incredible.” Finn says

“Even more incredible is her big news. Tell them.” Mr Shue says

“I got into Yale.” Quinn says

“It’s just amazing. After everything you’ve been through, you really deserve this Quinn.” Mr Shue stammers

“We are so proud of you, Quinn.” Mercedes says

“I wanted to thank you guys because without each and everyone of you, this would have never happened. You supported me and loved me through all the drama, and that’s why I’m standing here. I wasted so much time hating myself for the stupid mistakes I made, but the truth is, is that without all of those, I never would have dreamed this to be my future. I was the only one standing in the way of myself. You can’t change your past but you can let go and start your future.” Quinn says

“Yale yeah!” Mr Shue says as they all hug Quinn

Santana and Alexis walk down the hallway and see Kurt sitting in an empty classroom 

“You could feel the tension right?” Alexis asks

“Between who? The sexual tension between Faberry or the tension between Finn and Quinn?” Santana asks in response

“Both.” Alexis says before they dive into the classroom Kurt is in

“Hey, what are you doing?” Santana asks

“Trying to keep the flames from shooting out the side of my face.” Kurt says glumly

“Well trust me that outfit is not helping.” Alexis says

“I agree with Artie. I’m tired of being stepped on all the time. I take a lot of crap from a lot of people, but I refuse to take it from Sebastian the Criminal Chipmunk, so I’ve been sitting here for the last hour, making a list of ways to get back at him.” Kurt says

“So we’re in agreement he looks like a chipmunk.” Alexis says

“Well, today’s your lucky day, because Auntie Snixx and Snixx Jr. just arrived on the Bitchtown Express. Now, my suggestion is we drag him bound and gagged to a tattoo parlour for a tramp stamp that reads ‘Tips Appreciated’ or ‘Congratulations, You're my 1,000th customer’ both of which would be funny.” Santana says

“Or ‘Five Dollar Blowjobs’ that’d be funny too.” Alexis suggests

“After what he did to Blaine, I really wanted to hurt him. But I can’t. I fought against violence at this school for too long. I, I have to take the high road.” Kurt says

“You know what, Prancy Smurf? We respect that. You’re probably right. We want to go to a college that isn’t a FEMA trailer in a prison yard, so let’s take the high road. We’re not gonna beat Sebastian by playing dirty but we’re gonna beat him.” Santana says with that determined glint in her eyes

At Dalton

Santana and Alexis walk into Dalton with black dresses, fedoras and blazers on. “Let me do the talking. Hey Andrew McCarthy. Don’t know if you heard but Blaine may lose an eye the same Blaine who was besties with most of you not 4 months ago.” Santana says

“Wait are you serious? Is he gonna be okay?” Trent says with a worried look on his face

“Well sure if he doesn’t care about seeing in 3D.” Alexis says

“Trent I got this. Bummer about Blaine, he was pretty but he shouldn’t have gotten in the way that slushie was meant for Kurt.” Sebastian says

“You may look like the villain out of cheesy ‘80’s high school movies but you should know I’m fully prepared to go all Danny LaRusso on your ass. Admit you put something in that slushie. What was it, Glass? Asphalt?” Santana asks

“Red dye number 6” Sebastian replies smugly

“You’re a liar” Alexis says

“She questioned my honor. I demand satisfaction in Warbler traditions.” Sebastian says

“You wanna have a duel? Cello guys can you hang back for a second? I’m gonna need you for this one.” Santana says

“Everyone else clear out. I don’t want you to see me make a couple of girls cry.” Sebastian says

“Let’s just keep this on point.” Santana says as she and Alexis take a seat and the cello guys begin playing Smooth Criminal

[Sebastian:]  
“Uh, as he came into the window  
It was the sound of a crescendo, uh!  
He came into her apartment  
He left the bloodstains on the carpet, uh!  
She ran underneath the table  
He could see she was unable  
So she ran into the bedroom  
She was struck down  
It was her doom  
Annie are you OK?”

[Santana:]  
“So, Annie are you OK?”

[Sebastian:]  
“Are you OK, Annie?”

[Alexis:]  
“Annie are you OK?”

[Sebastian:]  
“So, Annie are you OK?”

[Santana:]  
“Are you OK, Annie?”

[Sebastian:]  
“Annie are you OK?”

[Alexis:]  
“So, Annie are you OK?”

[Sebastian:]  
“Are you OK, Annie?”

[Santana:]  
“Annie are you OK?

[Sebastian:]  
“So, Annie are you OK?”

[Santana, Alexis and Sebastian:]  
“Are you OK, Annie?  
Annie are you OK?  
Will you tell us that you're OK ([Sebastian:] uh!)  
There's a sign in the window  
That he struck you - A crescendo Annie  
He came into your apartment  
He left the bloodstains on the carpet ([Sebastian:] uh!)  
Then you ran into the bedroom  
You were struck down  
It was your doom”

[Sebastian:]  
“Annie are you OK?”

[Alexis:]  
“So, Annie are you OK?”

[Sebastian:]  
“Are you OK Annie?”

[Santana:]  
“Annie are you OK?”

[Sebastian:]  
“So, Annie are you OK?”

[Alexis:]  
“Are you OK Annie?”

[Sebastian:]  
Annie are you OK?

[Santana:]  
“So, Annie are you OK?”

[Santana, Alexis and Sebastian:]  
“Are you OK Annie?”

[Sebastian:]  
“You've been hit by”

[Santana:]  
“You've been struck by”

[Santana, Alexis and Sebastian:]  
“A Smooth Criminal”

[Santana and Alexis alternating (Sebastian):]  
“I don't know!  
(Annie are you OK, Will you tell us, that you're OK)  
I don't know!  
(There's a sign in the window)  
I don't know!  
(That he struck you - A crescendo Annie)  
I don't know!  
(He came into your apartment)  
I don't know!  
(Left bloodstains on the carpet)  
I don't know why baby!  
(Then you ran into the bedroom)  
I don't know!  
(You were struck down)  
(It was your doom - Annie!)  
(Annie are you OK?)  
Dang, gone it - Baby!  
(Will you tell us, that you're OK)  
Dang, gone it - Baby!  
(There's a sign in the window)  
Dang, gone it - baby!  
(That he struck you - A crescendo Annie)  
Hoo! Hoo!  
(He came into your apartment)  
Dang, gone it!  
(Left bloodstains on the carpet, uh!)  
Hoo! Hoo! Hoo!  
(Then you ran into the bedroom)  
Dang gone it!  
(You were struck down)  
(It was your doom - Annie!)”

[Sebastian:]  
“You've been hit by”

[Santana, Alexis and Sebastian:]  
“You've been struck by  
A Smooth Criminal”

“We were better.” Alexis says

“You weren’t even close.” Sebastian says

“We were better. Now tell us the truth. What do you put in that slushie?” Santana asks

“Rock salt. But it’s okay.” Sebastian says

How is it okay? We just told you Blaine had to have surgery.” Alexis says

“It’s okay because I didn’t put anything in these ones.” Sebastian says slushieing both girls

In the choir room

“Quick. Before Mr Shue gets here.” Santana says

“Brittany lock the door.” Alexis says

“Okay. But I don’t know how to do that.” Brittany says

“Um, what’s going on?” Rachel asks

“We’ve got the Warblers right where we want them. And because he’s the smoothest criminal we know, Artie was able to find a spy store that sells top secret surveillance equipment.” Santana says

“Not top secret. I just got a couple of tape recorders from OfficeMax.” Artie says

“Anyway. In any case Santana and I taped them to our underboob and when she and I went to Dalton we got Sebastian admitting on tape that there was rock salt in that slushie that blinded Blaine. Now, all we have to do is send these tapes to the po-po, and that little bitchlette is headed to juvie.” Alexis says playing the tape back revealing that Sebastian did exactly what the girls said he did

“No. No, we’re not doing that.” Kurt says

“Why? Kurt this isn’t violet. This is clever. We taped it to our underboob which let me tell you is a bitch to get off.” Alexis says

“So he gets kicked out of school. The Warblers still do Micheal, and they still beat us. Look I want to see Sebastian's head turning on spit, but I’ve realised that you can’t go looking for payback everytime the world wrongs you. If Micheal went after all the haters, he never would’ve had time to do all that amazing music. So we’re not gonna punish the Warblers. We’re gonna teach them a lesson, and I think I know how. I’ve reserved the auditorium, so if you’ll just follow me.” Kurt says

“Oh, wait if Kurt has taped this to his junk we’d have never heard the end of it. We’d have had a whole week of songs.” Santana says

“True.” Brittany says

The Warblers walk into the auditorium “nice of you to show.” Artie says

“Is whatever this gonna take long?” Sebastian asks with a snobbish voice “I can’t stand the stench of public schools.” 

“It won’t take long and all you have to do is sit and listen.” Quinn says

“We’re not doing Michael for Regionals.” Artie says in a level tone of voice

“I didn’t think you surrendered that easily.”

“We’re tired of the fighting and the back stabbin. We’re show choirs. We’re supposed to be supportive of each other.” Kurt says

“This is what we call taking the high road which I was shocked to find out has nothing to do with marijuana” Puck says

“Just cause you’re doing Michael doesn’t mean you understand Michael.” Artie says

“And you freaks do?” Sebastian asks

“Yes. And we’re about to show you.” Alexis says before playing a rapid riff on her guitar

[Artie & Alexis:]  
“Ouh!  
Ouh!”

[Artie:]  
“I took my baby  
On a saturday bang  
Boy is that girl with you  
Yes we're one and the same”

[Rachel:]  
“Now I believe in miracles  
And a miracle  
Has happened tonight  
Hee!  
Ah!”

[Santana and Artie with New Directions:]  
“But, if  
You're thinkin'  
About my baby  
It don't matter if you're  
Black or white”

[Kurt:]  
“Whoo!  
They print my message  
In the saturday sun  
I had to tell them  
I ain't second to none”

[Mercedes:]  
“And I told about equality  
And it's true  
Either”

[Mercedes and Santana:]  
“You're wrong  
Or you're right”

[Santana:]  
“Whoo!  
Ahh!”

[Rachel and Santana with New Directions:]  
“But, if  
You're thinkin'  
About my baby  
It don't matter if you're  
Black or white”

[Rachel:]  
“Hee!”

[Kurt:]  
“Don't babe!”

[Rachel:]  
“Hehe!”

[Santana and Rachel:]  
“I am tired of this devil  
I am tired of this stuff  
I am tired of this business  
Sew when the  
Going gets rough  
I ain't scared of  
Your brother  
I ain't scared of no sheets  
I ain't scared of nobody  
Girl when the  
Goin' gets mean”

[Artie:]  
“Protection  
For gangs, clubs,  
And nations  
Causing grief in  
Human relations  
It's a turf war  
On a global scale  
I'd rather hear both sides  
Of the tale  
See, it's not about races  
Just places  
Faces  
Where your blood  
Comes from  
Is where your space is  
I've seen the bright  
Get duller  
I'm not going to spend  
My life being a color”

[Kurt:]  
“Don't tell me you agree with me  
When I saw you  
Kicking dirt in my eye”

[Santana and Rachel with New Directions:]  
“But, if  
You're thinkin'  
About my baby  
It don't matter if you're  
Black or white  
I said if  
You're thinkin' of  
Being my baby  
It don't matter if you're  
Black or white  
I said if  
You're thinkin' of  
Being my brother  
It don't matter if you're  
Black or white”

All the Warblers get you on stage with the New Directions

[Santana:]  
“Yeah yeah yeah!”

[Rachel:]  
“Whoo!  
Black or white!”

[Santana, Artie and Rachel with New Directions:]  
“It's black, it's white  
It's tough for you to get by  
It's black, it's white, whoo  
It's tough for you to get by  
It's black, it's white  
([Santana:] Yeah yeah yeah!)  
It's tough for you to get by  
([Rachel:] Black or white!)  
It's black , it's white, whoo  
It's tough for you to get by  
It's black, it's white, whoo  
([Santana:] C'mon!)  
It's black, it's white, whoo  
([Santana:] Aah)  
([ND:] Yeah! Yeah! Yeah)  
It's tough for you to get by  
It's black, it's white, whoo  
It's tough for you to get by  
([ND:] Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!)  
([Artie:] Oouh!)”

“Very moving.” Sebastian says slow clapping mockingly

“Give it up Sebastian.” One of the Warblers says

“That is the kind of attitude that lost us Regionals last year.” Sebastian says

“I could call the cops or your headmaster and get you kicked out or even arrested for assaulting Blaine with that slushie.” Santana says

“All of this would be just awfully terrifying if you had any proof whatsoever.” Sebastian retorts

“You mean like you on tape admitting to it?” Santana says before gasping

“But you know what? It just wouldn’t be as much winning Regionals if you weren’t there to suffer the agony of defeat.” Kurt says tossing that tape to Sebastian who caught it

“At least now all your teammates get to know exactly what kind of guy you are.” Santana says

“Now get the hell out of our auditorium. Schools out.” Artie says

In the choir room

“You’re probably wondering why I’ve asked you all to come here.” Rachel says

“Not really it’s pretty obvious you like Quinn but you don’t wanna break up with Finnept.” Santana says

“What? How?” Rachel asks

“We could feel the sexual tension between you and Fagay in the choir room. So what happened?” Alexis asks

“Finn asked me to marry him and I told him I need more time and then I went to Quinn for advice and she told me she loved me and that if I wanted her she would be waiting.” Rachel says

“I’m not really sure how we can help you. I’ll tell you this, follow your head if you really don’t wanna marry Finn, tell him you’re in love with someone else and get with Quinn.” Alexis says


	11. The Spanish Teacher

In Spanish class

Mr Shue and the boys perform La cucaracha and Santana and Alexis look like they want to kill them

In history class

“And that’s how Germany won the Second World War.” Mrs Hagberg says

In the choir room

“All right guys! Let me ask you something. Where do you think you’ll be in the year 2030?” Mr Shue asks

“Broadway. Twinsies!” Kurt and Rachel say

“Walking.” Artie says

“On a tour for my fourth studio album with Skye.” Alexis says

“In jail or dead. Or both.” Puck says

“Wherever you are, whatever you're doing, you’re going to need to be able to speak Spanish. The reality is, by 2030, more people on this planet will be speaking Spanish than any other language. The world is changing. Our culture is changing. And that needs to be reflected in here. So for our next assignment, we’re only doing songs written or performed by someone Latin or of Latin descent. Or English songs performed bilingually.” Mr Shue says

“I’m bilingual.” Brittany says

“Uh, Mr. Shue though I love that we’re finally getting all Lima Sound Machine in here, why now?” Santana asks

“Oh, Santana, because it’s long overdue. The truth is, I love all things Latin. I mean, I love Latin food, Latin art, Latin people.” Mr Shue says

“You don’t know any Latin people.” Santana says

“Sorry I’m late I was flossing.” The man at the door says in Spanish

“I know. Guys this is David Martinez. David Martinez this is the Glee Club.” Mr Shue says

“Oh my God. Cutest.” Rachel starts

“Smile.” Sugar continues

“Ever.” Artie finishes

“Hello everyone. It’s an honour to be here with you. It’s a pleasure.” David says the second part in perfect Spanish

“David here is one of my many Latin friends. And, uh, he’s interested in starting his own night school Glee Club, after hours. So, uh, I invited him to come watch us get our duende on.” Mr Shue says

“Duende?” Finn asks

“Ugh, it means ‘dwarf’ you ass.” Santana says

“Now Puck and I are confused. What’s the assignment?” Alexis asks

“To sing, in Spanish, with duende. Which yes literally means ‘dwarf,’ but metaphorically, it means to have Spanish souls. To be filled with Spanish passion.” Mr Shue says

“That’s what she said.” Alexis says

“Will can I ¿hablar con ellos?” David asks

“That’s right.” Mr Shue says

“A performance with duende transforms you. Makes you sing, makes you cry, makes you laugh. Makes you want to kiss a person you love. A song sung in Spanish must have duende, or else.” David says

“Would you mind showing us?” Santana asks

“Oh dear God, please, yes.” Kurt says

“Be my guest.” Mr Shue says

“Okay. Well I’m not a professional like you guys, but I’ll give it a go.” David says

“All right.” Mr Shue says

“Now guys remember, Mr. Martinez is our guest okay? So let’s make him feel welcome.” Mr Shue says

[David Martinez:]  
“Uno, Dos, Tres, Quattro  
Yeah, yeah  
Cuando salgo a andar, girls be looking like 'que duro está  
Yo soy el cangre aqui, walking down the street in my new La Freak, yeah  
This is how I roll, animal print pants fuera control,  
I'll take y'all with my big afro  
Y como Bruce Lee I got the claw, yo”

[David Martinez and Artie (with New Directions):]  
“Girl look at that body  
Girl look at that body  
Girl look at that body”

[David:]  
“I work out”

[David Martinez and Artie (with New Directions):]  
“Girl look at that body  
Girl look at that body  
Girl look at that body”

[David:]  
“I work out”

[David Martinez (Artie):]  
“Cuando hago mí entrada, this is what I see (okay)  
Todo el mundo para pá mirarme a mí,  
I got passion in my pants and I ain't afraid to show it, show it, show it, show it.”

“I'm sexy and I know it.  
Soy sexy y lo sabes.”

“Vacilando en el mall, security just can't fight them off  
When I'm at the beach, I'm in a Speedo trying to tan my cheeks (what)  
This is how I roll, vamos ladies it's time to go  
Nos fuimos pá el bar, baby don't be suave  
No shoes, no shirt, como quiera me sirven, watch!”

[David Martinez and Artie (with New Directions):]  
“Girl look at that body  
Girl look at that body  
Girl look at that body”

[David:]  
“I work out”

[David Martinez:]  
“Cuando hago mí entrada, this is what I see  
Todo el mundo para pá mirarme a mí  
I got passion in my pants and I ain't afraid to show it, show it, show it, show it.”

“Check it out!  
Chequealo!  
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle yeah.   
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle yeah.  
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle yeah.  
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle yeah yeah.  
Do the wiggle, man!  
I say menealo, man, yeah.”

Soy sexy y lo sabes.

[David Martinez and Artie (with New Directions):]  
“Girl look at that body  
Girl look at that body  
Girl look at that body”

[David:]  
“I work out”

[David Martinez and Artie (with New Directions):]  
“Girl look at that body  
Girl look at that body  
Girl look at that body”

[David:]  
“I work out I'm sexy and I know it”

The entire song Alexis can’t help but smile at the girl she loves

“More good, more good.” Mr Shue says in Spanish

The next day in the choir room

“Sometimes it's hard to make things clear  
Or know when to face the truth  
And I know that the moment is here  
I'll open my heart and show you inside  
So open your eyes and see who I am  
And not who you want for me to be  
I am only myself, myself”

“Si voy a perderte ya  
Que sea por vez final  
Voy a perderte ya”

“Ye-ah”

“No, no vuelvas  
No, no vuelvas  
No vuelvas  
Si voy a perderte ya”

[Sam:]  
“Este amor llega así esta manera   
No tiene la culpa   
Caballo de danza vana  
Porque muy despreciado,  
Por eso no te perdono llorar  
Este amor llega así esta manera   
No tiene la culpa,  
Amor de compra y venta   
Amor de el pasado”

[Sam with ND guys:]  
“Bebele, bembele, bembele  
Bebele, bembele, bembele”

“Bamboleo, bambolea   
Porque mi vida, yo la prefiero vivir así   
Bamboleo, bambolea   
Porque mi vida, yo la prefiero vivir así”

[Sam:]  
“Would you dance  
If I asked you to dance?  
Would you run  
And never look back?  
Would you cry  
If you saw me crying?  
And would you save my soul, tonight?”

[Sam with ND guys:]  
“I can be your hero, baby ([ND guys:] Aaah!)  
I can kiss away the pain ([ND guys:] Aaah!)  
I would stand by you forever ([ND guys:] Aaah!)  
You can take my breath away”

[Sam:]  
“I can be your hero”

Guys, that was some muy serious footwork! Muy means very.” Mr Shue says

“I was in it mostly for the boots.” Kurt says

“Yeah what’s the deal with those boots? Because wow.” Mr Shue says

“They’re Mexican hipster boots. It’s kind of like a fad for a group of guys who are into dance music, and we’re kind of like a dance crew. Señor Martinez told us about it.” Finn says

“The teeth, the duende, the bizarre Mexican fads. Señor Martinez is, like, the best Spanish teacher ever. I can’t wait to see your performance Mr Shue.” Santana says

“My performance?” Mr Shue asks

“Yeah, to defend your Spanish teacher honour. I’m sure you have something muy amazing planned.” Santana says

“My turn.” Alexis says jumping up and Skye moves to follow her. “Not today little Miss, sit your cute ass down.” She jokingly scolds

“Don't touch me now  
Don't hold me now  
Don't break the spell Darling  
Now you are near  
Look in my eyes and speak to me  
The special promises I want to hear”

“Las palabras de amor  
Let me hear the words of love  
Despacito mi amor  
Love me slow and gently”

“One foolish world, so many souls  
Senselessly hurled through  
The never ending cold  
And all for fear and all for greed  
Speak any tongue  
But for God's sake we need”

“Las palabras de amor  
Let me hear the words of love  
Despacito mi amor  
Let me know, this night and evermore”

“This room is bare  
This night is cold  
We're far apart and I'm growing old  
But while we live  
We'll meet again  
So then my love  
We may whisper once more  
It's you I adore”

“Las palabras de amor  
Let me hear the words of love  
Despacito mi amor  
Touch me now  
Las palabras de amor  
Let us share the words of love  
For evermore  
For evermore  
For evermore”

In the auditorium

“¿Cómo puede ser verdad?”

“Last night I dreamt of San Pedro  
Just like I'd never gone, I knew the song  
Young girl with eyes like the desert  
It all seems like yesterday, not far away”

“Tropical the island breeze  
All of nature wild and free  
This is where I long to be  
La isla bonita”

“And when the samba played  
The sun would set so high  
Ring through my ears and sting my eyes  
Your Spanish lullaby”

“I fell in love with San Pedro  
Warm wind carried on the sea, he called to me  
Te dijo te amo  
I prayed that the days would last  
They went so fast”

“Tropical the island breeze  
All of nature wild and free  
This is where I long to be  
La isla bonita”

“And when the samba played  
The sun would set so high  
Ring through my ears and sting my eyes  
Your Spanish lullaby”

“Yo quiero estar donde el sol toca cielo  
Cuando es hora de siesta tú los puedes ver pasar  
Caras tan bellas, sin importar nada  
Where a girl loves a boy, and a boy loves a girl”

“Your Spanish lullaby”

“Tropical the island breeze  
All of nature wild and free  
This is where I long to be  
La isla bonita”

“And when the samba played  
The sun would set so high  
Ring through my ears and sting my eyes  
Your Spanish lullaby”

“La isla bonita  
La isla bonita, bonita bonita  
Your Spanish lullaby”

“Ladies and gentlemen, David Martinez.” Santana says

“Santana, fantástico. David, I’m just a little, I don’t know, confused about your participation here.” Mr Shue says

“Well he’s hot. I’m hot. And, hey, wasn’t that number fantastic and truly authentic?” Santana asks

“Thank you very much, everyone. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a stack of night school exams on my desk that won’t grade themselves so buena noches. Muchas gracias.” David says

“Well, Mr Shue, the floor is all yours.” Santana says

“A little less conversation, a little more action please  
All this aggravation ain't satisfactioning me  
A little more bite and a little less bark  
A little less fight and a little more spark  
Close your mouth and open up your heart and baby satisfy me  
Satisfy me baby

Vamos cierra los ojos y escuchate la música  
Que viaja por la brisa de verano  
Que padrísima la noche y ya te enseño como usarla  
Andale muchacha ve y relajate. Hey!  
Menos conversación y más acción por favor  
Este agravamiento no me satisface a mí  
A little more bite and a little less bark  
A little less fight and a little more spark  
No hables más y abre tu corazón y satisfáceme  
Sastifáceme bebe!

Come on baby I'm tired of talkin'  
Grab your coat and let's start walkin'

“A little less conversation, a little more action please  
All this aggravation ain't satisfactioning me  
A little more bite and a little less bark  
A little less fight and a little more spark  
Shut your mouth and open up your heart and baby satisfy me  
Menos conversación y más acción, por favor”

“Muchas Gracias”

“And once again my love for Spain has gone up in flames faster than the Hindenburg”. Alexis says

“It was you. You’re the one who complained to Principal Figgins about me.” Mr Shue says

“Yeah, and I do it all over again after that performance.” Santana says

“You’re messing with adult things here Santana. This is my job. This is my life.” Mr Shue says

“And this is my education, and it’s not a joke to me, although it seems to be one to you.” Santana says

“What are you talking about? They all loved my performance.” Mr Shue says

“Because they don’t know any better. My dad's sister in law is Latina and I grew up, was practically raised by the woman I called my tia as dad took an interest in Sugar was grooming her to follow in his footsteps while I took a shine to music rock and roll was my passion I excelled in theatricality and aced stage presence struggled with backing vocals but with work I passed I had a knack for song writing. She bought me my first guitar as soon as it could reach over it and all the way to the end of the neck.” Alexis says

“Alexis is right. It’s your fault. You’re their teacher. You went from La Cucaracha’ to a bullfighting mariachi. What don’t you just dress up as the Taco Bell Chihuahua and bark the theme song to Dora the Explorer? You don’t even know enough to be embarrassed about these stereotypes you're perpetuating.” Santana says

“That’s not fair.” Mr Shue says

“Isn’t it? What did you want to be when you grew up?” Alexis asks

“Why did you become a Spanish teacher Mr. Shue?” Santana asks

“Because it was the only teaching position open at the time.” Mr Shue says

“I want to remind you of something that an amazing teacher once taught me: without passion you can’t succeed.” Santana says

“Who taught you that?” Mr Shue adks

“You did. And you do. When you teach Glee.” Santana says


	12. Heart

In the choir room

Alexis puts her guitar across Skye’s body. “Good. Now index finger on the twelfth fret upper g string ring finger on the fourteenth fret a string. And now strum.” Alexis says as Skye plays out a loud rock note

“Did I do that?” Skye asks

“Yeah.” Alexis says as they hug she contemplated leaning in for a kiss but then Mr Shue walks in

“Okay, everybody, let’s hear it for love! Your assignment for Valentine's week is to find and perform the worlds greatest love songs. Now, regionals is next week, and we still need to raise $250 for costumes and hair spray.” Mr Shue says

“Oh god not another bake sale.” Kurt groans

“If any student gives $10, we will sing these worlds greatest love songs to their valentines we will serenade each classroom.” Mr Shue says

“No!” The group yell

“Yes!” Rachel says

“Two years ago we went room to room Christmas carolling, they threw food.” Tina says

“And shoes.” Mike adds as Sugar puts her hand up

“Yes, Sugar?” Mr Shue asks

“Not again.” Alexis says putting her head in her hands

“Here’s a spoon full of Sugar for you all: don’t sweat the small stuff, and it’s all small stuff when you’re rich. So here you go.” Sugar says handing Mr Shue $250

“Sugar I can’t take that.” Mr Shue says

“Take it!” Kurt snaps

“Okay. Everyone, give it up for Sugar for paying for our FinalNet and cummerbunds.” Mr Shue says

“Babe did she just buy the sound of applause?” Skye asks

“Yes she did.” Alexis says nodding solemnly

“Okay everyone look under your chairs. Except you, Artie. Your chair kept moving, so I hid your surprise in the wastebasket.” Sugar says

“Sis if you blow my arm off dad will kill you.” Alexis warns

“I found my ten minutes ago.” Puck says

“V-Day is my fave day ever. And to help me celebrate, my daddy’s throwing me and Lexi a huge, ridic party at Breadstixs. And I’m naming it the Sugar Shack. And drumroll Finn.” Sugar says

“I’d just like to say I didn’t ask for this.” Alexis says

“You’re all invited. But you have to bring a date. No single people allowed. They’re sad and boring and they don’t exist in my world.” Sugar says

“Um, but you’re single.” Mercedes points out

“Not for long.” Sugar says

“Put your index finger there and put your ring finger there. And use your fingers.” Skye says pointing to two separate frets and then Alexis uses her fingers to pluck the top string of Skye’s bass

“I like that we teach each other to play our respective instruments.” Alexis says

“I love you so much.” Skye says

“I love you too. And to show you that I’m gonna sing you a song.” Alexis says

“Today is gonna be the day  
That they're gonna throw it back to you  
By now you should've somehow  
Realized what you gotta do  
I don't believe that anybody  
Feels the way I do about you now”

Backbeat the word was on the street  
That the fire in your heart is out  
I'm sure you've heard it all before  
But you never really had a doubt  
I don't believe that anybody  
Feels the way I do about you now”

“And all the roads we have to walk are winding  
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding  
There are many things that I would like to say to you  
But I don't know how”

“Because maybe  
You're gonna be the one that saves me  
And after all  
You're my wonderwall”

“Today was gonna be the day  
But they'll never throw it back to you  
By now you should've somehow  
Realized what you're not to do  
I don't believe that anybody  
Feels the way I do about you now”

“And all the roads that lead you there were winding  
And all the lights that light the way are blinding  
There are many things that I would like to say to you  
But I don't know how”

“I said maybe  
You're gonna be the one that saves me  
And after all  
You're my wonderwall”

“I said maybe  
You're gonna be the one that saves me  
And after all  
You're my wonderwall”

“I said maybe  
You're gonna be the one that saves me  
You're gonna be the one that saves me  
You're gonna be the one that saves me”

In the hallway

“Happy Valentine’s Day.” Brittany and Skye say

“You’re giving us your computers?” Alexis and Santana ask

“No dummy. I made a playlist of all the songs that remind me of you. I was gonna make you a tape but I couldn’t find any tape decks. I did make you cover though.” Skye says

“It’s a playlist. With all the songs I hear in my head when I’m with you or when I’m thinking of you. I wanted to make you a CD for Valentine’s Day, but this is as far as I got without help oh and I made you a cover.” Brittany says

“This is amazing. You’re amazing.” Alexis says

“Brittany. Thank you.” Santana says

“You’re so welcome.” Skye says

“You’re welcome.” Brittany says as Skye leans in to kiss Alexis as Brittany leans in to kiss Santana

“Teen lesbians! I must see you in my office, right now.” Figgins says as they stop short of kissing

In Figgins office

“This is such bullcrap!” Santana yells

“I must agree.” Alexis says

“Why can’t Brittany and I kiss in public? Cause we’re two girls?” Santana asks

“Why can’t Lexi and I kiss in public? Cause we’re both girls no matter what anyone else says?” Skye asks

“Please don’t make this about your sapphic orientation. This is about public displays of affection. PDA simply has no place in the sacred halls of this school. We’ve had some complaints.” Figgins sans

“About us? When?” Santana asks

“Most recently yesterday at 12:16 and 12:43pm.” Figgins says

“That? Our lips barely grazed.” Santana argues

“I kissed her forehead for less than five seconds after I walked Skye to class.” Alexis says

“And did anyone tell you about the uncomfortable display that happened at 12:17pm and lasted for several uncomfortable minutes?” Santana asks and Alexis makes a face at the display that Finn and his new girlfriend put on after Rachel left him for Quinn

“Believe me, I’d much rather see you and Santana, and you and Alexis kiss than that so called Femily, but if a student files a complaint because for religious reasons.” Figgins says

“Oh great so some bible bashing redneck complained.” Alexis says

“So it was some bible thumper that complained.” Santana says

“Miss Lopez Miss Motta I’m sorry but I’m trying to keep this school from turning into a volatile powder keg.” Figgins says

“We’re sorry too. Cause all we wanna be able to do is kiss our respective girlfriends, but I guess no one can see that because there is such an insane double standard at this school.” Santana says as the four storm out of office and into the corridor

In the choir room

“You okay babe?” Skye asks

“Yeah just angry. I mean I met the perfect girl and I can’t kiss her when I choose because some people think the bible is law.” Alexis huffs

“Lexi, look at me I love you and we can always kiss outside of school.” Skye says as Mr Shue walks in

“Skyler Elizabeth Smith I love you.” Alexis says as they Eskimo kiss

“Artie four wheels on the floor please. Rachel, you had an announcement?” Mr Shue asks

“Yeah actually, Quinn and I had an announcement.” Rachel says they stand up holding hands which struck the group as odd. “Quinn and I are proud to announce we’re a couple!” She yells there’s a general happy response from the audience

“I knew Faberry would happen.” Santana says

“Can’t hurt to have more lesbians.” Skye says

“I agree.” Alexis says as they brush their knuckles against one another

“Now I have something to do. Now Valentine’s Day is rapidly approaching. So if you’ll excuse me. I got some sugary sweet game to spit. Give me a beat Finn.” Artie says wheeling into the middle of the room.

“Much as you blame yourself  
You can’t be blamed for the way that you feel  
Had no example of a love  
That was even remotely real  
How can you understand something that you never had  
If you let me I can help you out with all of that”

“Let me love you  
And I will love you  
Until you learn to love yourself.  
Let me love you  
I know your trouble  
Don’t be afraid, oh, I can help”

“Let me love you  
And I will love you  
Until you learn to love yourself.  
Let me love you  
A heart of numbness  
Gets brought to life  
I’ll take you there”

“I can see the pain behind your eyes  
It’s been there for quite awhile  
I just wanna be the one to remind you what it is to smile  
I would like to show you what true love can really do”

“Let me love you  
And I will love you  
Until you learn to love yourself.  
Let me love you  
I know your trouble  
Don’t be afraid, oh, I can help”

“Let me love you  
And I will love you  
Until you learn to love yourself.  
Let me love you  
A heart of numbness  
Is brought to life  
I’ll take you there”

“Let me love you  
And I will love you  
Until you learn to love yourself.  
Let me love you  
I know your trouble  
Don’t be afraid, oh, I can help”

“That’s all you need, baby.” Artie says as the song finishes

“Wheel me to class, baby.” Sugar says

In the courtyard

“So when did you guys get together?” Sugar asks

“Michael week.” Rachel says

“Has she asked you to the Sugar Shack tonight?” Santana asks

“Yes she has.” Rachel says

“Excuse me, are you Miss Rachel Berry?” Mercedes asks

“Um, yeah.” Rachel says

“Well we’re the God Squad, and we’re here to deliver a vocal Valentine from one Finn Hudson.” Mercedes says and Rachel’s face falls when she find out it’s not from Quinn but Finns stupid attempt to win her back. But she smirks slightly when Quinn winks at her

[Joe:]  
“My heart's a stereo  
It beats for you, so listen close  
Hear my thoughts in every no-o-ote  
Make me your radio ([Sam:] yeah)  
Turn me up when you feel low ([Sam:] turn it up a little bit)  
This melody was meant for you ([Sam:] right there)  
Just sing along to my stereo”

[Sam:]  
“If I was just another dusty record on the shelf ([Quinn:] Ooh)  
Would you blow me off and [with Quinn] play me like everybody else,  
If I ask you to scratch my back, [with Quinn] could you manage that? ([Mercedes:] Uh)  
Like it read well, check it Trouty, [with Quinn] I can handle that  
Furthermore, I apologize [with Quinn] for any skipping tracks ([Mercedes:] Uh)  
It's just the last girl that played me left a [with Quinn] couple cracks  
I used to used to used to used to, [with Quinn] now I'm over that ([Mercedes:] Oh yeah)  
Cause holding grudges over love is [with Quinn] ancient artifacts”

[Mercedes:]  
“If I could only find a note to make you understand  
I'd sing it softly in your ear and grab you by the hand  
[Sam:]  
Just keep it stuck inside your head, like [with Quinn] your favorite tune  
And know my heart is a stereo that only plays for you ([Mercedes:] Oh, whoa)”

[Joe with Quinn and Mercedes:]  
“My heart's a stereo  
It beats for you, so listen close  
Hear my thoughts in every no-o-ote ([Sam:] Yeah, yeah, yeah, come on)  
Make me your radio  
Turn me up when you feel low  
This melody was meant for you  
Just sing along to my stereo”

[Joe:]  
“Oh oh oh oh”

[Joe and Quinn:]  
“To my stereo”

[Joe:]  
“Oh oh oh oh”

[Joe and Quinn:]  
“So sing along to my stereo”

[Joe with choir harmonizing:]  
“I only pray you never leave me behind ([Sam:] never leave me)  
Because good music can be so hard to find ([Sam:] so hard to find) ([Mercedes:] oh)  
I take your head and ([Mercedes:] oh) hold it closer to mine ([Mercedes:] yeah, yeah)  
Thought love was dead, but now you're changing my mind!”

[Joe with Mercedes and Quinn:]  
“My heart's a stereo ([Sam:] yeah)  
It beats for you, so listen close  
Hear my thoughts in every note ([Mercedes:] you gotta make me a radio)  
Make me your radio”

“Turn me up when you feel low  
This melody was meant for you ([Mercedes:] yeah, yeah)  
Just sing along to my stereo ([Mercedes:] yeah)”

“Happy Valentine’s Day. Love, Finn. P.S. have you broken up with Quinn yet?” Mercedes says as Rachel rolls her eyes and winks at Quinn

“So you guys are Christian group?” Santana asks

“Yes.” Joe says

“And if either of us pay you, we can send a Vocal Valentine to whoever we want?” Alexis asks

“Ten bucks. That’s the deal.” Joe says

“Well I would like to send one to to my girlfriend Skye. And by that I don’t mean a friend who’s a girl. I mean my girlfriend girlfriend. As in out and proud lipstick loving bass playing girlfriend.” Alexis says slipping a $10 bill into the neck of Joe’s guitar

“You know what? You can have a two for one deal. And it will be sent to my girlfriend Brittany. In the same context as Skye and Alexis.” Santana says. “How does that sound?” She asks

“Can we go kill Finnept now?” Alexi asks

“Yes. For the pride of the lesbian community.” Santana says

In the choir room

“Hey Skye I was wondering if maybe you’d like to come to my sister's Sugar Shack thing?” Alexis asks

“I’d love to.” Skye says

“I was hoping you’d say that. I was counting on it actually.” Alexis says as she picks up her guitar

“Pretty woman, walking down the street  
Pretty woman, the kind I like to meet  
Pretty woman  
I don't believe you, you're not the truth  
No one could look as good as you”

“Mercy”

“Pretty woman, won't you pardon me?  
Pretty woman, I couldn't help but see  
Pretty woman  
That you look lovely as can be  
Are you lonely just like me?”

“Wow”

“Pretty woman, stop a while  
Pretty woman, talk a while  
Pretty woman, give your smile to me  
Pretty woman, yeah, yeah, yeah  
Pretty woman, look my way  
Pretty woman, say you'll stay with me”

“'Cause I need you, I'll treat you right  
Come with me baby, be mine tonight”

“Pretty woman, don't walk on by  
Pretty woman, don't make me cry  
Pretty woman, don't walk away, hey...  
OK”

“If that's the way it must be, OK  
I guess I'll go on home, it's late  
There'll be tomorrow night, but wait  
What do I see?”

“Is she walking back to me?  
Yeah, she's walking back to me  
Oh, oh, pretty woman”

“Look what I just found in my locker! ‘Bee Mine Forever, from your Secret Honey.’ I swear that Blaine is such a romantic.” Kurt says

“Horrifying.” Santana and Alexis say at the sight of Mike and Tina making out

“Everyone sit down, uh, listen up. Rory has the floor.” Mr Shue says

“I’ve been trying to get my student visa extended, so I can spend my junior year at McKinley, but I just found out my request was turned down. So when the school year ends, I’ll have to go back to Ireland. I miss my family so much, but you guys have become my second family. This song reminds me of you guys and … how much I’ve grown to love each and every single one of you, and how thankful I am that you’ve made a place, 3,000 miles away from Ireland, feel like home.” Rory says

“Another summer day   
Has come and gone away   
In Paris and Rome   
But I wanna go home   
Mmmmmmm”

“May be surrounded by   
A million people I   
Still feel all alone   
I just wanna go home   
Oh, I miss you, you know”

“And I’ve been keeping all the letters that I wrote to you   
Each one a line or two   
“I’m fine baby, how are you?”   
Well I would send them but I know that it’s just not enough   
My words were cold and flat   
And you deserve more than that”

“Another aeroplane   
Another sunny place   
I’m lucky, I know   
But I wanna go home   
Mmmm, I’ve got to go home”

“Let me go home   
I’m just too far from where you are   
I wanna come home”

“And I feel just like I’m living someone else’s life   
It’s like I just stepped outside   
When everything was going right   
And I know just why you could not   
Come along with me   
'Cause this was not your dream   
But you always believed in me”

“Another winter day has come   
And gone away   
In even Paris and Rome   
And I wanna go home   
Let me go home”

“And I’m surrounded by   
A million people I   
Still feel all alone   
Oh, let me go home   
Oh, I miss you, you know”

“Let me go home   
I’ve had my run   
Baby, I’m done   
I gotta go home”

“Let me go home   
It will all be all right   
I’ll be home tonight   
I’m coming back home”

Everyone claps. “Rory … I feel worse for you than I do for Artie. Will you be my date for Valentine’s Day?” Sugar asks

“It would be an honour.” Rory says they hug

At Skye’s house

Alexis knocks on the door wearing Jack & Jones jeans, a red Abercrombie and Fitch T-shirt, a wristwatch, black converse high tops and a baby blue suit jacket. Her hair cut short for the occasion styled like Roy Orbison and sunglasses a replica of Roy’s in her front jacket pocket

“Hi Mrs Smith is Skye ready?” Alexis asks

“She’ll be down in a minute. Come in and have a drink.” Skye’s mother says

“Thank you.” Alexis says

“So do you love my daughter?” Skye’s mom asks

“With all my heart. And I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I think she’s gonna love my gift.” Alexis says

“You still holding out on me about my gift?” Skye asks wearing a red dress which stops just above the knee a thin cardigan as a thin layer of protection her blonde hair styled so it’s falls perfectly in waves cascading over her shoulders and down her back the outfit is made her own by white converse high tops beat up and old but obviously loved by her

“Skye you look magnificent, fantastic and molto bene all at the same time.” Alexis says

“Shall we go?” Skye asks

“Your chariot awaits.” Alexis says as they link arms and walk to her car

At Breadstixs

Alexis feeds Skye chocolates and other little treats on the table

“Testing. Testing. Testing. Testing. What up McKinley?! Welcome to the Sugar Shack. Okay. Everyone look under your chairs, except you, Artie. Yours is in the potted plant right behind you. Attached to a Hickory Hills Cheese Heart are gift certificates worth $200 each for Bed, Bath and Beyond, Panda Express and Lima Malls Swatch Watch kiosk! I would like to thank my daddy for making tonight possible. And P.S: he’s not in the Mafia. And next up, straight from heaven above, give it up for the God Squad!” Sugar yells 

Hi. My name's Joe. Santana Lopez and Alexis Motta asked me if the God Squad would sing a love song for Brittany S. Pierce and Skye Smith. And after thinking and praying about it, I knew there was only one right answer. Absolutely. Love is love man. So here for Brittany and Skye from Santana and Alexis.” Joe says

“You did this for me?” Skye asks

“Well I know you’re not a material girl so I got you a memory instead.” Alexis says

[Quinn:]  
“Cherish is the word I use to describe  
All the feeling that I have hiding here for you inside”

[Sam and Joe:]  
“You don't know how many times I've wished that I had told you   
([Quinn and Mercedes:] Cherish the thought)  
You don't know how many times I've wished that I could hold you   
([Quinn and Mercedes:] Cherish the thought)  
You don't know how many times I've wished that I could  
Mold you into someone who could”

[Quinn and Sam:]  
“Cherish the thought”

[Quinn:]  
“Of always having you”

[Quinn and Sam:]  
“Here by my side”

[Quinn:]  
“Oh baby I....”

[Mercedes:]  
“Can't get away I won't let you Ooo..”

[Quinn and Mercedes:]  
“Who? You!”

[Quinn:]  
“I could never forget to  
Cherish is the word I use to remind me of”

[Quinn and Mercedes:]  
“Your love”

[Sam and Joe:]  
“You don't know how many times I've wished that I had told you   
([Quinn and Mercedes:] Cherish the thought)  
You don't know how many times I've wished that I could hold you   
([Quinn and Mercedes:] Cherish the thought)  
You don't know how many times I've wished that I could  
Mold you into someone who could”

[Quinn and Mercedes with Joe and Sam:]  
“Cherish me as much as I cherish you  
Cherish the thought, Oooh”

As the song ends Alexis can think of only one thing to do she dips Skye and presses her lips against Skye’s and deeply kisses her.

“Okay everyone it’s time for my extra special guest, back from the dead and cute and compact as ever!” Sugar yells pointing to the guy by the door who turns around and reveals it to be Blaine

“Happy Valentine’s Day everybody! This song is dedicated to all the lovers in the room.” Blaine says wiping off the heart shaped eye patch to reveal to a healed eye Brittany, Mercedes, Rachel, Skye and Alexis hop up snagging the back up mics and the bands electric and bass guitars

[Blaine:]  
“If you see a faded sign at the side of the road that says  
'15 miles to the”

[Mercedes:]  
“Love shack', love shack, yeah, yeah  
I'm headin' down the Atlanta highway”

[Mercedes with Rachel and Brittany:]  
“Lookin' for the love getaway, headed for the love getaway”

[Blaine:]  
“I got me a car, it's as big as a whale ([The Girls:] Love getaway)  
And we're headin' on down to the love shack ([The Girls:] Love getaway)  
I got me a Chrysler, it seats about 20 ([The Girls:] Love getaway)  
So hurry up and bring your jukebox money”

[Mercedes with Rachel and Brittany:]  
“The love shack is a little old place  
Where we can get together  
Love shack, baby  
([Blaine:] A love shack, baby)  
Love shack, baby, love shack  
Love shack, baby, love shack”

[Kurt:]  
“Hop in my Chrysler, it's as big as a whale  
And it's about to set sail  
I got me a car, it seats about 20  
So come on and bring your jukebox [With Santana on Show Version:] money”

[Mercedes with Rachel and Brittany:]  
“The love shack is a little old place ([Mercedes:] little old place)  
Where we can get together  
Love shack, baby  
([Blaine:] A love shack, baby)  
([Mercedes:] oh oh)  
Love shack, baby, love shack ([Mercedes:] oh oh)  
Love shack, baby, love shack ([Mercedes:] Love shack, baby, love)”

[Rachel and Brittany:]  
“Bang, bang, bang, on the door, baby  
([Blaine:] Knock a little louder Sugar)  
Bang bang bang,on the door, baby  
([Blaine:] I can't hear you)  
Bang, bang  
([Blaine:] On the door, baby)  
Bang, bang  
([Blaine:] On the door)  
Bang, bang   
([Blaine:] On the door, baby)  
Bang, bang”

[Blaine:]  
“You're WHAT?”

[Kurt:]  
“Tiiiiiiiiin roof!, RUSTED.”

[Mercedes:]  
“Love shack!”

[Rachel and Brittany with Mercedes:]  
“Love shack, baby, love shack ([Mercedes:] yeah)  
Love shack, baby, love shack ([Mercedes:] Love shack)  
([Blaine:] Love baby that's where it's at, yeah)  
([Blaine:] Love baby that's where it's at)  
Love shack, baby, love shack ([Mercedes:] Love shack)  
([Blaine:] Huggin' and a kissin')  
Love shack, baby, love shack ([Mercedes:] Baby, love shack...)  
([Blaine:] Dancin' and a lovin' at the love shack)”

As the song finishes each couple in the Sugar Shack kisses passionately

As they walk out Slye shivers. “Are you cold?” Alexis asks

“Yeah.” Skye says as Alexis wraps her jacket around Skye’s shoulders

“There you go.” Alexis says opening the door to her car

“I had the best time tonight.” Skye says as they drive home.

“I hope you enjoyed your present.” Alexis says

“I couldn't have asked for anything better. It was beyond perfect.” Skye says

“I’m glad you enjoyed it. Cause that wasn’t the only one.” Alexis says pulling out the guitar from their first gig in the Troubletones

“Your guitar for me really?” Skye asks. “It’s perfect. I love it. Well this is me.” She says as they pull up outside their house 

“And a kiss goodnight for the lady.” Alexis says taking Skye’s lips upon her own

“I like this side of you.” Skye says before getting out of the car her gift in hand a goofy grin on her face

“Miss you already.” Alexis says as she watches the other girl enter her house and begin gushing to her mother about her perfect date


	13. On My Way

In the Lima Bean

“Ah coffee. The teenage songwriters crack.” Alexis says sipping her coffee

“What you working on today?” Santana asks

“A little song called Nowhere.” Alexis says sliding the notebook over to Santana

“Well, well, well, if it isn’t female Brian May and The Devil. I brought you a birthday gift.” Sebastian says putting an A4 brown paper envelope on the table 

“Oh my god!” Santana yells covering the obvious photoshopped picture of Skye

“That is clearly photoshopped. She is not that hairy or brown. And even if she could fit in those pumps she wouldn't. She's too much of a tomboy, that’s what I love about her.” Lexi says flipping the photo over

“Just think from now until eternity, any time someone Google’s Skye Smith, they’ll be treated to that and dozens like it. That’s the beauty of the internet. It stays with us forever” Sebastian says

“What’d you want, chipmunk?” Santana aks

“I want a guaranteed regionals win so I want you and your little girlfriend to drop out. McKinley gets home court advantage this year. You’re both gonna come down with Asian bird flu or whatever Tina Blowing-Wang just had.” Sebastian says

“No. I will not let arseholes sabotage me.” Alexis says

“You give a bad name to the entire gay community.” Santana says

“Yes and you given the gay community it’s next lesbian pornstar.” Sebastian says

“I’m sorry I didn’t hear you, your giant horse teeth were too distracting to me.” Santana says

“You and Skye have 24 hours to drop out or I press the upload button.” Sebastian says before walking out

In the choir room

“That’s it. I’m leaving this classroom, and I’m kicking that Sebastian kids ass!” Skye yells

“Skye chill.” Mr Shue says

“No, I’m not going to chill. I’m done chilling.” Skye says

“The official show choir rule book says that ‘any real or perceived threat of violence, vandalism or humiliation will be with a swift and unquestioned disqualification of the threatening parties with extreme prejudice.’ It’s right here. Page 72, bylaw 15, section six, article 44.” Artie says

“Guys, I contacted the headmaster of Dalton.” Mr Shue says

“Like you did when Sebastian almost blinded me? What did they do then? Same thing as they're gonna do now nothing.” Blaine says

“None of this matters now anyways, okay? I don’t care what Sebastian does, I'm gonna perform and we’re gonna win.” Alexis says

“Even if he's going to post a photo like this of me if you do?” Skye asks

“You forget I’m very good at making people see things the way I want them to. Even without fists.” Alexis says

“If someone posted a picture like that of me online, I’d probably kill myself.” Sugar says

“Twice to be sure I was dead.” Rory says

“You guys are just gonna have to deal with things like this. The more successful you get, the more garbage people are gonna make up about you. They’re gonna love to tear you down.” Mr Shue says

“I can’t believe you would do this to me.” Skyr says

“I’m not negotiating with Sebastian. He has a punch face if I sat down with him the first thing I’d do is punch him in the face. Besides I don’t care about stuff like that. I love you and we’ll manage this together even if it means committing B&E.” Alexis says

“The important thing right now is that we win.” Rachel says

“No it isn’t.” Alexis says

“So you wouldn’t care if I photoshopped a photo like this of you and put it on the internet?” Skye adks

“For once in my life I want to be the same as everyone else but because of who I am I’ve become a target for hate.” Alexis says

“I’m sorry you’re right I shouldn’t be mad at you.” Skye says as they hug

“Hold on. Santana?!” Alexis yells running out the room

In the Lima Bean

“Let me break it down from you from one bitch to another now that I’m not attempting to claw my own eyes out. All of this vicious underhanded crap has got to stop.” Santana says

“Exactly. That’s why I called you here. First of all Blaine I am sorry about your eye.” Sebastian says

“That means nothing to me.” Blaine says

“Just give me a chance. I had no excuses, other than a lame prank got way out of control. Second of all the Skye photos have all been destroyed. I want the Warblers to win fair and square. And we’re gonna take donations for Lady Gaga's Born This Way Foundation. Win, lose or draw we’re gonna dedicate our performance to Dave Karofsky. I thought you might want to join us.” Sebastian says

“Wait for the punch, you know it’s coming.” Kurt says

“No, not this time. For too long I have treated everything as a big joke. It’s all fun and games until it’s not.” Sebastian says

Everyone’s in a circle in the auditorium in a circle as Mr Shue holds a jar of peanut butter. “Mr Shue why do you have a jar of peanut butter with only one spoon?” Mercedes asks

“Yeah there are 17 of us here, and I’m only comfortable sharing a spoon with about half of you.” Sugar says

“Well it’s come to my attention that our good friend Rory Flanagan has never tried peanut butter.” Mr Shue says. The entire Glee Club goes into uproar. “Rory if you don’t mind.” Mr Shue says standing up and giving him some peanut butter.

“Oh God… oh my god that’s the best thing I’ve ever tasted.” Rory says taking the jar from Mr Shue everyone laughs

“Mr. Schuester, while that was incredibly moving, it’s kind of been an emotional week for some of us.” Kurt says

“Mr Shue what’s the point of all this?” Finn asks

“The point is Rory just had a brand new experience, something as simple as peanut butter. You guys are young. I want you to promise me that, no matter how depressed you get, no matter how hopeless or alone you feel, you’ll try your best to imagine all of the amazing experiences you have ahead of you.” Mr Shue says

“Mr. Shue I know we’re a little dramatic sometimes but I don’t think anyone will ever consider taking their own life.” Mercedes says

“I did.” Mr Shue says. “Junior year. That was a tough year. I cheated on my math midterm peeked at the answers of the guy next to me and the teacher saw me do it. They called my dad at his office, and he was coming to pick me up. How was I supposed to look him in the eye? I just kept picturing my dad so disappointed in me. So I walked up to the roof. I went right to the edge. One step and all the pain and humiliation would be over.” Mr Shue says

“Is that true?” Kurt asks

“That day, I promise you, it felt like it was the end of the world.” Mr Shue says. “But do you know what? It wasn’t for me. You know for some of you getting caught cheating isn’t a big deal. But there’s something … everyone has something that might take them up to that edge. And look at all the things I would’ve missed out on. I would’ve never met you guys or Emma. I would’ve missed out on everything. So right now I want you all to say something that you’re looking forward to. Big things.” Mr Shue says

“Someday I want to earn enough money to buy my folks a new place, so they don’t ever have to go through losing their home again.” Sam says

“I’m most looking forward to meeting Rachel Berry and Quinn Fabray’s love child. A head bitch with an ego that’s a power combo.” Mercedes says everyone laughs as Rachel mouths ‘thank you’

“I want to be there to see my kids take their first steps.” Artie says

“I want be there to see Sex and the City Part 3.” Sugar says

“Wow.” Mr Shue says as everyone laughs

“I’m sort of embarrassed to admit it, but I really do wanna graduate high school.” Puck says

“I’m gonna petition the army to change my dad’s dishonourably discharge status to an honourable one.” Finn says

“I’m looking forward to my own wedding when my kind of wedding is legal.” Quinn says

“I’m looking forward to the day when my grandmother loves me again.” Santana says

“I’m looking forward to the day when I get to play Madison Square Gardens and Wembley with my amazing supportive future wife.” Skye says

“I’m looking forward to the day when I can walk around without fear of being me.” Alexis says

“I want Lord Tubbington to kick his Ecstasy addiction.” Brittany says Santana glares at anyone who dares to call Brittany stupid

“I am looking forward to marriage equality in all 50 states.” Blaine says

“I just want a song.” Tina says

“I’m looking forward to the first time I dance at Carnegie Hall.” Mike says

“I’m looking forward to watching my dad make a difference in Congress.” Kurt says

“I’m looking forward to being friends with all of you for the rest of my life.” Rachel says

“I know this sounds silly, and the peanut butter really is amazing Mr. Shue, but do you know what I’m looking forward to? Winning at Regionals.” Rory says

“Now let’s meet our judges for the 2012 Midwest Regionals! Deputy zoning commissioner Melba Jackson Wright! President of the Ohio plumbers union local 109, Mr Harl Beindorf! And central Ohio’s number one late night horror movie host Svengooble!” The PA voice says

“No way!” Skye yells

“And now from Westerville Ohio the Dalton Academy Warblers!” The PA voice says

[Sebastian with Warblers:]  
“Come on, stand, up again  
Stand, you’re gonna run again”

[Sebastian:]  
“Don’t give up,  
You’re gonna see tomorrow  
[Sebastian with Warblers:]  
That you’ll be on your feet again”

[Sebastian:]  
“Sometimes the world’s gonna knock you over  
But you will see who are your friends ([Warblers:] Ooooo!)”

[Sebastian with Warblers:]  
“Come on, stand, up again  
Come on, stand,  
Stand, you’re gonna run again”

[Sebastian:]  
“Your faith and patience will be your soldiers”

[Sebastian with Warblers:]  
“To guide you through your troubled times”

[Sebastian:]  
“Just put one foot in front of the other”

[Sebastian with Warblers:]  
“The battles are inside your mind”

[Sebastian:]  
“You have the power to face your demons”

[Sebastian with Warblers:]  
“No matter how they go at times”

[Sebastian:]  
“And rid yourself of your fear and weakness  
So you can start to live your life ([Warblers:] Ooooo!)”

[Sebastian with Warblers:]  
“Come on, stand, up again  
Come on, stand,  
Stand, you’re gonna run again”

[Sebastian:]  
“Come on!”

[Warblers:]  
“Come on, stand, ([Sebastian:] Come on baby!) up again ([Sebastian:] Stand yeah!)  
Come on, stand, ([Sebastian:] You can baby!)  
[Sebastian with Warblers:]  
Stand, you’re gonna run again”

[Sebastian:]  
“Pick up your will”

[Sebastian with Warblers:]  
“And put on your face”

[Sebastian:]  
“If you need to, just take my hand ([Warblers:] Take my hand)  
It’s time to demonstrate, don’t hesitate ([Warblers:] Don’t hesitate)  
Just get up and say "Yes, I can" ([Warblers:] "Yes, I can")”

[Warblers:]  
“Come on, stand, ([Sebastian:] Come on baby!) up again ([Sebastian:] Stand yeah!)  
Come on, stand, ([Sebastian:] Come on you can baby!)  
[Warblers:]  
Stand, you’re gonna run again  
[Sebastian:]  
Stand, you’re gonna run again”

[Warblers:]  
“Come on, stand, ([Sebastian:] Ohhhh stand yeah!) up again ([Sebastian:] Stand up again!)  
Come on, stand, ([Sebastian:] Ohhhh come on baby!)  
Stand, you’re gonna run again ([Sebastian:] Stand stand!)  
Stand, you’re gonna run again ([Sebastian:] Come on!)  
Stand, you’re gonna run again ([Sebastian:] Gonna run again!)”

Despite them being the competition the New Directions cheer on the Warblers

“Thank you. Just a reminder to please make a donation to one of our charity baskets. We’re set up all around the auditorium. Just look for the Dalton blazer. Please give what you can.” Sebastian says

“The sun goes down  
The stars come out  
And all that counts  
Is here and now  
My universe will never be the same  
I'm glad you came”

“You cast a spell on me, spell on me  
You hit me like the sky fell on me, fell on me  
And I decided you look well on me, well on me  
So let's go somewhere no one else can see, you and me”

“Turn the lights out now  
Now I'll take you by the hand  
Hand you another drink  
Drink it if you can  
Can you spend a little time,  
Time is slipping away,  
Away from us so stay,  
Stay with me I can make,  
Make you glad you came”

“The sun goes down  
The stars come out  
And all that counts  
Is here and now  
My universe will never be the same  
I'm glad you came  
I'm glad you came”

“You cast a spell on me, spell on me  
You hit me like the sky fell on me, fell on me  
And I decided you look well on me, well on me  
So let's go somewhere no one else can see, you and me”

“Turn the lights out now  
Now I'll take you by the hand  
Hand you another drink (drink)  
Drink it if you can (can)  
Can you spend a little time,  
Time is slipping away,  
Away from us so stay (stay),  
Stay with me I can make,  
Make you glad you came”

“The sun goes down  
The stars come out  
And all that counts  
Is here and now  
My universe will never be the same  
I'm glad you came  
I'm glad you came”

“I'm glad you came  
I'm glad you came  
I'm glad you came”

“The sun goes down  
The stars come out  
And all that counts  
Is here and now  
My universe will never be the same  
I'm glad you came  
I'm glad you came”

“And now from Our Lady of Perpetual Sorrow High School, the Golden Goblets.” The announcer says

In the choir room

“So Golden Goblet singers were way better than I thought they would be.” Puck says

“Are you high? I couldn’t hear their instruments at all.” Brittany says

“All right guys listen up. Don’t let them get into your heads okay?” Mr Shue says

“Who? the competition or my dysphoria demons?” Alexis asks

“Neither. Stay focused on what we do best.” Mr Shue says

“Okay uh… Alexis you wanted to start us off?” Mr Shue says

“Yeah. I know it’s gonna sound crazy but I’ve finally decided what I want to do so Skye and I are gonna be recording when we get out of here.” Alexis says

“We didn’t wanna do anything else.” Skye adds

“I think you’ll make amazing recording artists.” Santana says

“Come on. Bring it in.” Mr Shue says as they all put their hands in the middle

“Amazing!” They all yell

[Rachel:]  
“I came to win, to fight, to conquer, to thrive  
I came to win, to survive, to prosper, to rise”

[Rachel with New Directions:]  
“To fly, to fly”

[Santana:]  
“Oh yo, yo”

[Artie:]  
“I used to think that I could not go on”

[Santana:]  
“I wish today it will rain all day  
Maybe that will kinda make the pain go away”

[Artie:]  
“And life was nothing but an awful song”

[Santana:]  
“They got their guns out aiming at me  
But I become near when they aiming at me”

[New Directions:]  
“If I can see it”

[Blaine:]  
“Me, me, me against them  
Me against enemies, me against friends  
([New Directions:] Then I can do it)  
Somehow they both seem to become one  
A sea full of sharks and they all smell blood  
([New Directions:] If I just believe it)  
They start coming and I start rising  
Must be surprising, I'm just surmising  
([New Directions:] There's nothing to it)”

[Blaine and Santana:]  
“I win, thrive, soar, higher, higher, higher  
More fire”

[Rachel and Santana:]  
“I came to win, to fight, to conquer, to thrive  
I came to win, to survive, to prosper, to rise”

[Finn and New Directions:]  
“I believe I can fly  
([Rachel:] Fly)  
I believe I can touch the sky  
I believe I can fly  
([Rachel:] Fly)  
I believe I can touch the sky”

[Mercedes with ND girls:]  
“Get ready for it, get ready for it”

[Artie:]  
“Then I can be it  
([Mercedes with ND Girls:] Get ready for it, I came to win)  
If I just believe it, there's nothing to it  
([Mercedes with ND Girls:] Get ready for it, get ready for it, get ready for it)”

[Mercedes:]  
“Get ready for it!  
Yeah!”

[Artie and New Directions:]  
“I believe I can fly  
([Rachel:] Fly)”

[Finn and New Directions:]  
“I believe I can touch the sky  
([Mercedes:] Sky)  
I think about it  
([Rachel:] Fly)  
Every night and day  
Spread my wings and fly away  
([Mercedes:] Ooh)”

[Finn and Artie with New Directions:]  
“I believe I can soar  
([Rachel:] Fly)  
([Mercedes:] Get ready for it)  
I see me runnin' through that open door  
([Mercedes:] Get ready for it)  
([Mercedes:] Fly)  
I believe I can fly  
([Rachel:] Fly)  
([Mercedes:] Get ready for it)”

[Finn:]  
“I believe I can fly”

The boys run off stage leaving the girls on stage

“You know the bed feels warmer  
Sleeping here alone  
You know I dream in colour  
And do the things I want”

“You think you got the best of me  
Think you had the last laugh  
Bet you think that everything good is gone  
Think you left me broken down  
Think that I'd come running back  
Baby you don't know me, cause you're dead wrong”

“What doesn't kill you makes you stronger  
Stand a little taller  
Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone  
What doesn't kill you makes a fighter  
Footsteps even lighter  
Doesn't mean I'm over cause you're gone”

“What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, stronger  
Just me, myself and I  
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger  
Stand a little taller  
Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone”

“You heard that I was starting over with someone new  
They told you I was moving on, over you”

“You didn't think that I'd come back  
I'd come back swinging  
You try to break me, but you see”

“What doesn't kill you makes you stronger  
Stand a little taller  
Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone  
What doesn't kill you makes a fighter  
Footsteps even lighter  
Doesn't mean I'm over cause you're gone”

“What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, stronger  
Just me, myself and I  
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger  
Stand a little taller  
Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone”

“Thanks to you I got a new thing started  
Thanks to you I'm not the broken-hearted  
Thanks to you I'm finally thinking about me  
You know in the end the day you left was just my beginning  
In the end…”

“What doesn't kill you makes you stronger  
Stand a little taller  
Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone  
What doesn't kill you makes a fighter  
Footsteps even lighter  
Doesn't mean I'm over cause you're gone”

“What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, stronger  
Just me, myself and I  
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger  
Stand a little taller  
Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone”

“What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, stronger  
Just me, myself and I  
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger  
Stand a little taller  
Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone”

[Rachel:]  
“We could just go home right now  
Or maybe we could stick around  
For just one more drink, oh yeah  
Get another bottle out  
Let's shoot the breeze  
Sit back down  
For just one more drink, oh yeah”

“Here's to us  
Here's to love  
All the times  
That we messed up  
Here's to you  
Fill the glass  
'Cause the last few days  
Have gone too fast  
So let's give them hell  
Wish everybody well  
Here's to us  
Here's to us”

“Stuck it out this far together  
Put our dreams through the shredder  
Let's toast 'cause things got better  
And everything could change like that  
And all these years go by so fast  
But, nothing lasts forever”

[Rachel with New Directions:]  
“Here's to us  
Here's to love  
All the times  
That we messed up  
Here's to you  
Fill the glass”

[Rachel:]  
“'Cause the last few nights  
Have gone too fast”

[Rachel with New Directions:]  
“If they give you hell  
Tell them go forget themselves  
Here's to us  
Here's to us”

[Rachel:]  
“Here's to all that we kissed  
And to all that we missed  
To the biggest mistakes  
That we just wouldn't trade”

[Rachel with New Directions:]  
“To us breaking up  
Without us breaking down  
To whatever's coming our way!”

[Rachel:]  
“Here's to us!  
Here's to us!”

[New Directions:]  
“Here's to us  
Here's to love  
All the times  
That we messed up”

[Rachel with New Directions:]  
“Here's to you  
Fill the glass”

[Rachel:]  
“'Cause the last few days  
Have gone too fast”

[Rachel with New Directions:]  
“So let's give them hell  
Wish everybody well”

[Rachel:]  
“Well!”

[New Directions:]  
“Here's to us  
Here's to love”

[Rachel with New Directions:]  
“All the times  
That we messed up  
Here's to you  
Fill the glass  
'Cause the last few nights  
Have gone too fast  
If they give you hell  
Tell them forget themselves”

[Rachel:]  
“Here's to us”

[New Directions:]  
“Here's to us”

[Rachel:]  
“Oh here's to us”

[New Directions:]  
“Here's to us”

[Rachel with New Directions:]  
“Here's to us  
Here's to love  
([ND:] Here's to us)”

[Rachel:]  
“Wish everybody well”

[Rachel with New Directions:]  
“Here's to us  
Here's to love  
Here's to us”

[Rachel:]  
“Here's to us”

Dramatic orchestral music plays as Svengooble climbs out of a coffin. “I’ve crossed oceans of time to bring results of this show choir competition. In third place, from Our Lady of Perpetual Sorrow, the Golden Goblets. And now the moment you’ve all been waiting for. The 2012 Midwest Regional champion from McKinley High … the New Directions!” He says

Outside McKinley

A car comes barrelling down the road. “Quinn, look out!” Alexis yells as the car plows into Quinn

“Quinn don’t move.” Skye says

“I can’t feel my legs. Oh god I can’t feel my legs!” Quinn yells


End file.
